Verified by Psychology Today
Dating and mating in a complex world
Caitlin Cantor LCSW, CST, CGT
Compromising our boundaries is one of the most disempowering, self-defeating things we can do. So why do we do it?
These three mental mistakes can make the dating journey a complete waste of time and energy.
3. If you get attached when you have sex, don’t have sex until you’re attached.
Does the online dating world feel like a total sh*t show? That’s because it is. Here's what you need to know.
How to stop wasting time on the wrong people and find the right person faster.
Do you feel like you’re living with a roommate instead of a romantic partner? You may need to shift your priorities.
Can you imagine sitting with your partner, having a hard conversation, and feeling seen, heard, valued, and connected? It’s possible when you practice these communication skills.
Do you want more from your sex life and intimacy? Slowing down might be just what you need to heat things up.
You have much more power than you realize in your relationship. By doing the work to become more aware of yourself, you’ll discover you have more choices in how you participate.
If there are issues in your relationship, they will show up when you have sex, too. It's important to deal with the issues that exist so you can create more connection.
Have you ever been told you have daddy issues and felt shame? It's time to recognize that there is nothing wrong with you.
If you've been in toxic relationships in the past, you'll have wounds that need healing. You'll have been hurt. Learn to heal and remove those toxic habits with your partner.
Learn how your attempts to control are keeping you from getting your needs met, and begin to loosen your grip.
Do you allow yourself to be vulnerable in your relationship? Start to notice how you're keeping yourself safe, and take steps toward more vulnerability and deeper connection.
Helpful tips for talking to your loved ones about racism.
Are you experiencing anger right now but aren't sure how to combat it?
Are you afraid that you may be missing red flags in your relationship, but unsure what would qualify? Here are some signs that you want to look out for.
Tired of painful, damaging fights with your partner? Learn how to communicate during a fight in a way that builds trust and promotes a sense of safety between you.
Is dating wearing you out? A few adjustments can go a long way.
Stop waiting for your needs to be met and step into your power.
Struggling to communicate with your partner? Learn the most important communication skill there is and how to get better at it.
It's time to get out of your own way and create the life you long for.
Not sure how to keep the romance alive? A few lifestyle changes can go a long way.
What will you do to cultivate more sexual wellness this year?
Do you suffer from painful thoughts and feelings about your body? Start practicing new ways of relating to yourself to lessen shame and strengthen compassion for your body.
Is criticism destructive in your relationship? Learn to have a conversation that leads to closeness instead.
Is online dating bringing you down? Try pushing yourself further out of your comfort zone, and give yourself the gift of self-growth and new outcomes.
If you're a Millennial, you may be more skilled at being alone than you are in relationships. Learn the relational skills you missed if you grew up during the self-esteem movement.
Pole dancing can help you celebrate your body just as you are right now. Give your inner critic a day off!
Your judgmental thoughts may be in the way of getting to know people and connecting with them. If you're single and frustrated, it's time to get out of your own way.
Caitlin Cantor, LCSW, CST, is a licensed psychotherapist, AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, Gestalt Therapist and relationship expert. She has a private practice in Philadelphia, PA.