Was Will Smith in Control of His Actions at the Oscars?

My wife and I were watching the Oscars last night when the incident happened with Will Smith and Chris Rock. Chris Rock had just told what was apparently an off-the-cuff joke about Will Smith’s wife during his appearance at the Oscars. It was clear when they showed Jada Pinkett Smith that she was not amused and did not laugh. The next thing we saw was Will Smith leaping onto the stage and actually striking Chris Rock. At first, it may have looked like it was pre-planned, but quickly became clear it was not. Will Smith then returned to his seat and let out an expletive statement making it clear he was displeased with Chris Rock’s attempt at humor.

Wow. Did Will Smith logically think it through before leaping on stage? If he’d considered it for a few moments, would he still have chosen to take the actions he did? My thought is probably not. I don't believe a major celebrity like Will Smith wants to be seen cursing at and physically assaulting someone on worldwide television. He also seemed to apologize for his outburst in his acceptance speech.

However, it was those few moments when he was apparently unable to stop himself from leaping on stage and striking Chris Rock that are so shocking. If it were his emotions grabbing control of him and controlling his actions, I wonder how many people have had experiences like this. Incidents where emotions grab hold of them and caused them to act out in ways they might not have normally done.

In a situation like what occurred last night, while it may have been a surprise to me and the rest of the Oscar viewers, it seems no real harm was done. Chris Rock may be a bit bruised, and the internet may go crazy with their “feud,” however, the bottom line is both men will most likely move forward with their lives as successful people.

The consequences of acting on emotions without thinking

The bigger problem is that people don’t always get a second chance when their emotions grab control of them. For example, if Will Smith had been carrying a weapon last night, might he have used it? There are thousands of people in jail right now doing hard time because they let their emotions grab control of them and control their actions. It only takes a few seconds of losing control to stab or shoot someone. I’m sure that many times when a person reacted violently, they may have immediately regretted their actions after it was too late.

That’s why it’s so important to be able to separate our emotions from our logic and not confuse the two. Our feelings are not us. They just think they are. We do not have to allow our feelings to control our actions. Just because we feel like harming someone doesn’t mean we have to do it. It only takes a moment of losing control to potentially affect someone’s entire life.

In our society, we place a lot of emphasis on being strong. We all want to stand up to people and not let ourselves (or our loved ones) be bullied. This morning, a lot of people are talking about how Jada Pinkett Smith suffers from alopecia. Did Chris Rock know this? Maybe. If he did, it certainly makes his joke in worse taste.

However, the bottom line is that it was a joke. It was not intended to be a serious attack. It was meant as a joke. If a comedian has to worry that their jokes will spark someone to slap them, or worse, then how can comedians operate?

Jokes are sometimes offensive. They may even be hurtful. If so, we have a right to voice our displeasure. We have a right to not watch the comedian. However, we do not have a right to let our emotional upset cause us to turn to physical violence. The minute that becomes the norm, then free speech goes out the window.

How many lives have been lost or resulted in people sitting in jails for decades because their emotions grabbed hold of them? Sometimes a few minutes of loss of control can completely devastate someone’s life. If you have a gun or a knife, it can take seconds to destroy all you have built.

The bottom line

Forgiveness Essential Reads

6 Ways to Temper Your Partner’s Tantrums

The Importance of Forgiveness Campaigns

Not being able to separate our feelings from our actions can lead to horrific consequences. It is imperative we recognize that we as human beings have the ability to not let our feelings control us. We just have to be able to discern the difference between what we’re feeling and the actions we choose to take. It is our choices that define us as human beings; however, it is our feelings that can cause us to throw away everything without considering the consequences.

I’m sure Chris Rock will recover from Will Smith’s assault. However, they are the lucky ones. There are many people who will not recover because their moment of “losing it” caused a horrific outcome that they may now be paying for the rest of their lives. If we as a society can put more emphasis on understanding our emotions and recognizing they may not always be causing us to make our best choices, we could have a more reflective and less violent world.