Showing Love to the One Who Loves You

There are many holidays where we shower those we love with special gifts and kindness, but this behavior is not reserved for holidays. It's important to express our love throughout the years.

Every day is new, and each morning I wake with my wife, one of us says “I love you” and the other responds. We even have a little chat about how much before we start our day. This reassurance on a daily basis is very important to both of us, but many people only say “I love you” on special occasions or when they are in trouble with their partner.

If you can’t say “I love you,” then you really can’t be in a relationship fully. Many people hold back words of love and compliments to keep the other person guessing, but doing this makes the main person in your life feel insecure and unstable. If the one you say you love has to wonder if you really do, it is going to eat away at your relationship.

For some people, these words don’t matter. They tend to pay more attention to actions. Perhaps the nonverbal acts of love are what they need to feel good about themselves and their relationship, and if that works, it’s great. I just can’t help feeling that when the three little words are seldom (or never) said, something will feel like it’s missing.

My partner has my back, which I know even when we disagree. She has her way of doing things, and I have mine, and if they don’t mesh, we compromise and acknowledge each other. Then we celebrate in some way, with a hug and kiss, going out for a bite, or just smiling at each other, knowing that we handled our little issue the best way possible. And we always say “I love you” when we resolve a problem.

I believe there is a deeper meaning behind those three words, and just hearing them makes us feel warmer inside. We get the feeling that no matter what happens in the world, we will be okay because we have the love of the person who matters to us most. The words are also a celebration in themselves; knowing that you have the right person by your side can make all the difference and help keep your troubles in perspective.

I am aware that there are many people who are not cut out for a loving relationship, which is totally okay. It’s also hard for some people to say “I love you,” and this may be because of something traumatic from their past. Saying the words isn’t necessary so long as you lovingly acknowledge your partner.

Doing this is not a panacea—it will not solve all your troubles—but it will help make the relationship as good as possible. It should become easier and easier with time, as the words will come more naturally. If not, please talk to your partner about it. Let them know how you feel in whatever way works for both of you. That is really the objective here.