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There are three stages of man: he believes in Santa Claus; he does not believe in Santa Claus; he is Santa Claus. — Bob Phillips
It is no surprise that the season is accompanied by excess stress. Some research has demonstrated that upwards of nearly 90 percent of Americans feel the end-of-year strain. It is also a time where anxiety and depression can worsen. This year is particularly difficult as anxiety and depression have already been rising as Covid becomes the norm with little end in sight. But what is it about the season that can cause so much more distress? In short, there are many explanations, we’ll just cover a few — the family, the kids, and the money.
The Family – Although family gatherings and traditions can be an opportunity for the family to reconnect, they can also be an opportunity for conflict. This time of year is often wrought with too many plans and not enough time to relax and enjoy the moments with each other.
The Kids – Oh the joy of youth. Children are truly a gift. However, the season can certainly make them increase our stress. In addition to the anticipation of getting more toys, the kids are out from school and away from their routines, and their sugar intake seems to increase exponentially.
The Money – Whether you initially set a budget and blown it or simply didn’t plan financially, you are likely feeling the effects of over-spending and or inflation.
Men and Women Are Different
Although women have been found to experience more holiday stress than men, men and women experience the end of the year and stress differently. It is not likely that most of you are getting worked up about perfecting the art of gift-wrapping or finding the perfect balance of cinnamon, ginger, and cloves in your gingerbread recipe.
For many men, this month brings stress from loading up the car with gifts, lugging the kids back and forth to show off to different relatives, and somehow finding ways to actually enjoy the time off from work. The stress for men is generally less about perfecting the season and more about navigating it efficiently.
Here are some quick and easy things to keep in mind as you, or the men in your life, celebrate.
Practical Tips for Men to Reduce the Stress
Stay present. Often referred to as mindfulness, staying focused on the present will reduce the sadness or depression that may come from things not going as planned or the angst associated with getting too focused on what’s next?
The kids were just so bad – I’m so embarrassed! Why did Uncle John say I gained weight? We better hurry if we want to get to my brother’s house. Ack, Monday will be here before you know it.
Push away any thoughts that are judgments about what happened or what might.
Make time for fun. Not stereotypical holiday fun, like decorating cookies and building gingerbread houses. Focus on doing things that you actually find fun. Not everything that is fun needs to be costly either. There are many websites with low to no-cost ideas if you need inspiration. Whether it is something simple like reading, watching a movie, taking a walk, or something more complex that requires planning like a day trip — do it with intention.
Take a break. Isn’t time off from work considered a break? With the kids home from school and all the running around inherent to being festive, it does not always feel like a break. In any event, walking away from the vaccine debate sparked by the Covid *shot* glasses grandma bought for everyone can do wonders for your mental health.
If the stress spills into the new year, check out the Psychology Today Therapy Directory to find someone to talk to.
