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How to Face and Not Fear Intrusive Thoughts

3 steps to help you feel more empowered when dealing with intrusive thoughts.

Key points

  • Intrusive thoughts can feel overwhelming.
  • Understanding what they are all about can make them less scary.
  • Discover an effective, and pleasurable, way to release intrusive thoughts.
Pexels/ Pixabay
Source: Pexels/ Pixabay

Do you struggle with intrusive thoughts seemingly appearing out of nowhere and disrupting your peace of mind?

These thoughts can be unsettling, ranging from disturbing images to irrational ideas, leaving you questioning their origin and impact on your mental well-being. You may prepare dinner, or sit in the office when suddenly your mind conjures a scary image or crazy idea that leaves you wondering about what just happened.

The thought could be about harming a loved one, wondering about your sexuality, or worrying about what happens to your children when you die.

Sometimes you can shrug these thoughts off as misfiring of your brain. But other times, you may be bombarded by such a barrage of similar ideas that you start to be concerned about whether you are losing your mind.

Here are some steps to help you feel less afraid and more empowered when dealing with intrusive thoughts.

Step 1: Understanding the Nature of Intrusive Thoughts

Intrusive thoughts are common and do not indicate anything wrong with you. Research suggests that approximately 90 percent of individuals experience unwanted thoughts regularly.

Intrusive thoughts are not truthtellers or reflections of your character. They can be random, nonsensical expressions of the mind, similar to involuntary body jerks or twitches that occur as a form of tension release.

In other words, intrusive thoughts often lack deeper meaning or purpose and should not be taken literally. Some of the more disturbing thoughts may make you wonder whether you could truly harm somebody or do harm to yourself. Yet, the truth is that without your conscious consent, thoughts don’t have the power to force you to take action.

One way to perceive intrusive thoughts is that they often spontaneously arise from the subconscious mind, which also communicates through dreams. And just like dreams, intrusive thoughts can serve as a form of mental-emotional release or a way for your subconscious to address issues without conscious input (Rachman, 2013).

Understanding this aspect of subconscious communication can help you interpret intrusive thoughts in a broader context.

Step 2: Let Go

You may have experienced this firsthand; the more you argue with or fight intrusive thoughts, the more likely they take hold of your mind (Purdon & Clark, 2001). Ignoring these randomly bubbling-up ideas is also challenging, especially if you fear them—like trying to eliminate a lion that broke into your house by pretending it doesn’t exist.

Instead, the key is recognizing that a thought is just a thought, not the truth or a premonition. It is simply your mind releasing some mental energy. By accepting its existence and choosing to move on, you can let go of the attachment to the thought.

This shift in mindset requires time and effort, as neuroplasticity, the brain's ability to reorganize itself, takes time. Think of it as manually shifting gears in a car.

To reinforce this new perspective, follow the acknowledgment and acceptance of thoughts with pleasurable experiences. Engage in activities that release dopamine, such as playing music, helping others, working out, petting a dog, or going for a walk.

By associating releasing intrusive thoughts with pleasurable experiences instead of anxiety, you reshape how you perceive and respond to them. Remember, this process takes some time and patience.

However, not all intrusive thoughts should be dismissed outright. Some might carry valuable messages from your subconscious mind. How can you distinguish between mind junk and ideas that hold useful information?

Step 3: Calmly Observe—Then Interpret and Address

If certain thoughts persistently arise, instead of trying to let go of them, consider writing them down, much like you would record your dreams. Approach these thoughts as emanating from your subconscious mind, understanding that they might be metaphorical rather than literal.

Then carefully reflect on their themes, emotions, or underlying concerns, which may help you identify potentially unresolved issues. For example, suppose you frequently have thoughts about harming your family. In that case, you might discover anger and powerlessness and, upon further reflection, recognize that you are frustrated about constantly serving others without them and yourself considering your own needs.

This realization might lead you to work on your boundaries, self-care, and communication with your loved ones.

Similarly, if you have thoughts about harming yourself, try to identify any past traumas or unresolved emotions that may be connected to those thoughts. A client realized that her self-harming thoughts were linked to the suicide of a friend from high school.

She discovered lingering anger towards this friend and themselves for not showing and recognizing the signs of distress earlier. Another client noticed that his recurring thoughts of jumping off a bridge were not driven by suicidal ideations but by the desire to escape the constant stress and pressure he was putting on himself.

By acknowledging and curiously exploring intrusive thoughts, you can gain clarity on the deeper challenges and possible traumas that need to be addressed. However, ask for support from a mental health care professional when you feel that your intrusive thoughts become too overwhelming and emotionally draining.

There are excellent methods, such as cognitive behavioral therapy, EMDR, mindfulness meditation, and hypnotherapy, that can help you manage intrusive thoughts better.

Intrusive thoughts can be distressing, but understanding their nature and implementing effective coping strategies can help you regain control over your mind and reduce their impact on your daily life.

References

Belloch, A., Morillo, C., Lucero, M., Cabedo, E., & Carrio, C. (2004). Intrusive thoughts in non-clinical subjects: the role of frequency and unpleasantness on appraisal rating and control strategies. Clinical Psychology and Psychotherapy, 11, 100–110.

Abramowitz JS, Taylor S, McKay D. Obsessive-compulsive disorder. Lancet. 2009 Aug 8;374(9688):491-9. doi: 10.1016/S0140-6736(09)60240-3

Purdon C, Clark DA. Suppression of obsession-like thoughts in nonclinical individuals: impact on thought frequency, appraisal and mood state. Behav Res Ther. 2001 Oct;39(10):1163-81. doi: 10.1016/s0005-7967(00)00092-9

Rachman S. Cleaning damned spots from the obsessive mind. Nature. 2013 Nov 7;503(7474):7. doi: 10.1038/503007a

Clark, D. A., & Rhyno, S. (2005). Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts in Nonclinical Individuals: Implications for Clinical Disorders. In D. A. Clark (Ed.), Intrusive thoughts in clinical disorders: Theory, research, and treatment (pp. 1–29). The Guilford Press.

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