Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

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(918) 228-0896 Call Us

Email Us

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC (she, her)

Verified by Psychology Today Verified by Psychology Today

5 Endorsed

Call Us

Let's Connect (918) 228-0896

Available both in-person and online

2417 E 53rd St Suite 101 Tulsa, OK 74105

Website

You are incredibly self-aware. You know your patterns, and you know exactly which ones are costing you your peace, your self-respect, and your relationships. Yet, in the heat of the moment, that knowledge doesn’t seem to matter. Your nervous system takes over, and you find yourself reacting in the same old ways—triggered by past pain or stuck in a cycle of emotional exhaustion. It is frustrating to feel like you are "knowing better" but not "doing better." If you have tried therapy before and found that simply venting about your past didn't actually give you the tools to change your present, you are in the right place.

My approach is different. I’m an active partner who moves beyond the "why" and focuses on the "how." We trade passive listening for a practical toolkit: silencing your internal critic, setting firm boundaries without guilt, and steadying your nervous system in real-time to stop the cycle of self-sabotage.

Build a life worth living defined by your values, not your triggers. You don't need another person to just nod and take notes; you deserve a structured, skills-based roadmap to get your life back. Let’s stop just talking about change and start creating it. Reach out today to schedule a free 15-minute consultation and finally bridge the gap to relief.

Call or Email Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy now for a free 15 minute consultation - (918) 228-0896

Practice at a Glance

Available both in-person and online

2417 E 53rd St Suite 101

Tulsa, OK 74105 map

(918) 228-0896

Charleston, SC 29401

Website

Ready to bridge the gap between knowing what's going wrong and learning the skills to actually change things? Start with a free 15-min call.

I specialize in Trauma and PTSD, Relationship Issues and Borderline Personality (BPD)

$175 Per Session, I accept insurance

Individual one-on-one therapy

Click for a brief video introduction.

Let's Connect (918) 228-0896

Practice at a Glance

Available both in-person and online

2417 E 53rd St Suite 101

Tulsa, OK 74105 map

(918) 228-0896

Charleston, SC 29401

Website

Ready to bridge the gap between knowing what's going wrong and learning the skills to actually change things? Start with a free 15-min call.

I specialize in Trauma and PTSD, Relationship Issues and Borderline Personality (BPD)

$175 Per Session, I accept insurance

Individual one-on-one therapy

Click for a brief video introduction.

Finances

Fees

Individual Sessions $175
Sliding scale: apply if you may be eligible

Payment Methods

American Express, Cash, Discover, Health Savings Account, Mastercard, Venmo, Visa

Insurance

Aetna
BlueCross and BlueShield
Health Choice
Healthcare Highways
Quest Behavioral Health
Out of Network

You deserve specialized care that works. To make this investment more accessible, I submit out-of-network claims on your behalf to get you reimbursed quickly. My focus is on providing high-impact, skills-based therapy that saves you time in the long run by getting to the root of the change you need.

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Qualifications

Licensed Professional Counselor: Elaine Bender

Verified by Psychology Today Licensed by State of Oklahoma / 10971 Elaine Bender

Education and Years In Practice

Attended Oklahoma State University, Master of Science in Counseling

Additional Credentials

License: South Carolina Counselors Board 2793 / 2026

Certificate from National Board for Certified Counselors 2022

As a Nationally Certified Counselor with an MBA in Organizational Leadership, my approach is structured, objective, and results-oriented. I don't rely on guesswork; I utilize evidence-based protocols (DBT, CBT, ACT) to ensure your progress is visible and measurable in your daily life.

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Specialties and Expertise

Top Specialties

Trauma and PTSD
Relationship Issues
Borderline Personality (BPD)

Expertise

Anxiety
Codependency
Coping Skills
Domestic Abuse
Domestic Violence
Grief
Impulse Control Disorders
Life Transitions
Mood Disorders
Peer Relationships
Personality Disorders
Self-Harming
Stress
Suicidal Ideation

Trauma and intense relationship cycles require more than just a listening ear. Together, we'll map out your specific triggers and develop a skills-based toolkit to navigate them. My goal is to move you from a state of constant overwhelm to feeling equipped, allowing you to find both immediate relief and lasting stability.

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

5 Endorsements

Madison Brooks

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC

Elaine is an incredibly well-rounded therapist. She offers warmth, connection and tangible skill building to create a life worth living. I have worked closely with Elaine and have seen first hand how helpful she is to clients from many walks of life.

Cassie Abraham

Licensed Professional Counselor, MHR, LPC

Elaine is a compassionate and knowledgeable therapist. Her experience working with individuals with complex trauma has given her the foundation to be able to expertly treat any condition. She is a true gem that I would entrust any one I love with!

Jordan Iturbe Gustin

Licensed Professional Counselor, MA, LPC-S, IMH-E, ERS

Elaine is a wonderful therapist who cares deeply for her clients. She is organized and prepared for every session. She carefully considers each individual's needs to be able to walk alongside them in their journey to a more fulfilling, whole life.

Lauren Torkleson

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC-S

Elaine is a warm and compassionate therapist that cares deeply for her clients. Elaine is well organized and thoughtfully prepares for each session to meet her client's needs.

Alissa Scharf

Marriage & Family Therapist, MS, LMFT

Elaine is kind and compassionate. She has a warm spirit, allowing her clients to be themselves.

Client Focus

Age

Preteen ,

Teen ,

Adults

Participants

Individuals

Religion

Christian

Age

Preteen ,

Teen ,

Adults

Participants

Individuals

Religion

Christian

Treatment Approach

Types of Therapy

Acceptance and Commitment (ACT)
Christian Counseling
Cognitive Behavioral (CBT)
Dialectical Behavior (DBT)
Gottman Method
Internal Family Systems (IFS)
Trauma Focused

In my approach, every tool is chosen to ensure your growth is practically visible in your daily life. DBT, CBT, and ACT offer the practical skills to manage your present, while IFS and Trauma-focused work address the source of your past pain. This combination allows us to move beyond just understanding why you feel this way and focus on the mechanics of how to build a life worth living.

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call or Email us for a free 15 minute consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Groups

DBT Skills Group - Virtual

Hosted by

Elaine Bender

If insight hasn't stopped your spirals, you don't need more talk -- you need tools. I offer three structured DBT skills groups grounded in mindfulness. Distress Tolerance teaches concrete survival strategies to stop crisis spirals. Emotion Regulation provides active mood management to decrease emotional intensity. Interpersonal Effectiveness uses communication scripts to set firm boundaries. To maintain an intentional, premium environment, cohorts are strictly capped at 8 participants. Book your 15-minute consultation call today to secure your spot before this window closes.

Expertise

Anxiety

Borderline Personality (BPD)

Trauma and PTSD

Types of Therapy

Dialectical Behavior (DBT)

Age

Adults

Session Cost

$30-$40

Group Meets

Every Fri 12 P.M. - 1 P.M.

Location

Virtual Sessions

2417 East 53rd Street

Tulsa, OK 74105

Email Elaine Bender about this group or call - (918) 228-0896

Friendshipping: Womens Skills & Social Group

Hosted by

Elaine Bender

CURRENTLY WAITLISTED // Tired of being fine but lonely? If scrolling leaves you wondering why connection is so hard, you don't need a social club, you need tools. The Friendshipping Intensive is a 9 week social skills group in Tulsa for women in their 20s and early 30s. We move past awkward small talk to build an authentic inner circle. Learn to read the room, handle hard conversations, and navigate relationship gray areas. To maintain an intentional, premium space, cohorts are strictly capped at 8 participants. Book your 15 minute consultation today to secure your spot.

Expertise

Peer Relationships

Women's Issues

Age

Adults

Session Cost

$40-$50

Group Meets

Every Mon 5:30 P.M. - 6:45 P.M.

Location

Whole Life Counseling

2417 East 53rd Street

Suite 101

Tulsa, OK 74105

Email Elaine Bender about this group or call - (918) 228-0896

Location

Primary Location

2417 E 53rd St Suite 101

Tulsa, OK 74105

(918) 228-0896

Email Us

Website

Additional Location

Charleston, SC 29401

(918) 228-0896

Nearby Areas

Cities

Counties

Zips

Ready to bridge the gap between knowing what's going wrong and learning the skills to actually change things? Start with a free 15-min call.

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call for a free consultation now - (918) 228-0896

Ready to bridge the gap between knowing what's going wrong and learning the skills to actually change things? Start with a free 15-min call.

Elaine Bender - DBT & Trauma Therapy

Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC

Call for a free consultation now - (918) 228-0896

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