Borderline Personality (BPD) Therapists in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA

Photo of Lane DiFlavis, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Lane DiFlavis
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, LCSW
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
I believe that all people are deserving of love & healing. All too often life does what life does and we lose sense of our self, our worth, & our belonging. Choosing to pursue therapy is a radical act of self love & a gift towards enriching your life, deepening your understanding of self, & improving your relationships. Congratulations on taking this courageous first step on a journey towards your most authentic self & more satisfying life.
I believe that all people are deserving of love & healing. All too often life does what life does and we lose sense of our self, our worth, & our belonging. Choosing to pursue therapy is a radical act of self love & a gift towards enriching your life, deepening your understanding of self, & improving your relationships. Congratulations on taking this courageous first step on a journey towards your most authentic self & more satisfying life.
(215) 883-4414 View (215) 883-4414
Photo of Peter Andrew Danzig, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Peter Andrew Danzig
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, LSW, MSS, MA, CTP
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
Psychotherapist, toy analyst, Senior Leadership Strategist, and Diversity and Inclusion Professional in the Greater Philadelphia region. Peter’s research and practice interests are invested in community mental health, theories on adult play and the ways it frames our social interactions, and trauma informed work with clients and artists/creatives. Peter’s clinical approach is rooted in holistic, relational and humanistic theory. Peter’s research and Op-Eds have been featured in the ​Psychology Today, The Wall Street Journal, Philadelphia Gay News, The Mighty, and others.
Psychotherapist, toy analyst, Senior Leadership Strategist, and Diversity and Inclusion Professional in the Greater Philadelphia region. Peter’s research and practice interests are invested in community mental health, theories on adult play and the ways it frames our social interactions, and trauma informed work with clients and artists/creatives. Peter’s clinical approach is rooted in holistic, relational and humanistic theory. Peter’s research and Op-Eds have been featured in the ​Psychology Today, The Wall Street Journal, Philadelphia Gay News, The Mighty, and others.
(610) 632-1303 View (610) 632-1303
Photo of Tyler Rogols, Licensed Professional Counselor in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Tyler Rogols
Licensed Professional Counselor, MBA, MA, LPC
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109
Accepting new clients! I help people overcome difficulty and use it to grow and pursue a life of meaning and purpose. Sometimes we start by treating stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, career, or LGBTQ+ and other identity issues, and over time turn to deeper issues about the life you want to create, your identity, and your values. I’m a humanistic counselor, which means I’ll never tell you what to do and I’ll always empower you to make the choice that’s best for you. I use a collaborative, gentle approach that helps you connect with your intuitive sense of self and your intrinsic motivation to grow and do difficult things.
Accepting new clients! I help people overcome difficulty and use it to grow and pursue a life of meaning and purpose. Sometimes we start by treating stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, career, or LGBTQ+ and other identity issues, and over time turn to deeper issues about the life you want to create, your identity, and your values. I’m a humanistic counselor, which means I’ll never tell you what to do and I’ll always empower you to make the choice that’s best for you. I use a collaborative, gentle approach that helps you connect with your intuitive sense of self and your intrinsic motivation to grow and do difficult things.
(267) 263-7753 View (267) 263-7753
Photo of Sarah Trotta, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Sarah Trotta
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, DSW, LCSW
Verified Verified
1 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109
People often come to therapy with a precise problem to address, and sometimes people come to therapy with a general sense that they are not living their lives in a way that feels right or true. Therapy is useful in many circumstances; it’s an opportunity to understand and change painful patterns, to treat a mental health disorder, to heal from previous trauma, to process the impact of oppression, to mobilize oneself when feeling “stuck," and so much more. Whatever your reason for seeking treatment, I believe that therapy can help you create a life that holds more joy, connection, and purpose.
People often come to therapy with a precise problem to address, and sometimes people come to therapy with a general sense that they are not living their lives in a way that feels right or true. Therapy is useful in many circumstances; it’s an opportunity to understand and change painful patterns, to treat a mental health disorder, to heal from previous trauma, to process the impact of oppression, to mobilize oneself when feeling “stuck," and so much more. Whatever your reason for seeking treatment, I believe that therapy can help you create a life that holds more joy, connection, and purpose.
(215) 867-5169 View (215) 867-5169
Photo of Marcus Anthony Krohner, Licensed Professional Counselor in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Marcus Anthony Krohner
Licensed Professional Counselor, MS, LPC, NCC
Verified Verified
2 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
Overwhelmed by negative thoughts and emotions? Do you hope for more fulfillment in life? Our work together will identify perceptions causing anxiety, sadness, anger, guilt and feelings of inadequacy. I welcome you to join me for a free consultation. Together we will acknowledge your feelings and perceptions and address impulsivity, avoidance patterns/procrastination, self-sabotage, lack of focus, isolating and subtle behaviors preventing wellness. Discovering your meaning and purpose will inevitably help you become yourself authentic self.
Overwhelmed by negative thoughts and emotions? Do you hope for more fulfillment in life? Our work together will identify perceptions causing anxiety, sadness, anger, guilt and feelings of inadequacy. I welcome you to join me for a free consultation. Together we will acknowledge your feelings and perceptions and address impulsivity, avoidance patterns/procrastination, self-sabotage, lack of focus, isolating and subtle behaviors preventing wellness. Discovering your meaning and purpose will inevitably help you become yourself authentic self.
(215) 839-1177 View (215) 839-1177
Photo of Hana Kubkova, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Hana Kubkova
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, LCSW
Verified Verified
1 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
I am a clinical social worker licensed in Pennsylvania with 13 years of experience working with children, adolescents, and adults. I have worked in a variety of settings, including an inpatient and outpatient-psychiatry center, a foster care residential facility, a women’s counseling agency, and a drug and alcohol rehabilitation clinic. I currently see clients in my private practice in Philadelphia for short-term (10-12 sessions) or long-term treatment (6 months or longer), depending on their goals. My collaborative therapeutic approach combines multiple techniques (e.g. Gestalt, Psychodynamic, EMDR, CBT, and Mindfulness).
I am a clinical social worker licensed in Pennsylvania with 13 years of experience working with children, adolescents, and adults. I have worked in a variety of settings, including an inpatient and outpatient-psychiatry center, a foster care residential facility, a women’s counseling agency, and a drug and alcohol rehabilitation clinic. I currently see clients in my private practice in Philadelphia for short-term (10-12 sessions) or long-term treatment (6 months or longer), depending on their goals. My collaborative therapeutic approach combines multiple techniques (e.g. Gestalt, Psychodynamic, EMDR, CBT, and Mindfulness).
(415) 917-2996 View (415) 917-2996
Photo of Timothy Walsh, Licensed Professional Counselor in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Timothy Walsh
Licensed Professional Counselor, MA, LPC, NCC, CCTP, CMHIMP
Verified Verified
17 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
Life is a journey and we aren't meant to travel alone. Sometimes it's helpful to have a person to travel the path with you, to shine light in the dark places. Engaging in counseling is one way in which to get support with your struggles. If you are struggling with depression, anxiety, relationship issues, school, issues of faith, addictions or any other disruption to your life, I would love to get to know you and to help shine light in the dark places.
Life is a journey and we aren't meant to travel alone. Sometimes it's helpful to have a person to travel the path with you, to shine light in the dark places. Engaging in counseling is one way in which to get support with your struggles. If you are struggling with depression, anxiety, relationship issues, school, issues of faith, addictions or any other disruption to your life, I would love to get to know you and to help shine light in the dark places.
(484) 498-6634 View (484) 498-6634
Photo of Edward Dreslinski, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Edward Dreslinski
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, LCSW-S
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109  (Online Only)
I believe that successful therapy starts with a strong, collaborative relationship between the therapist and client. I understand that each one of my clients has a unique story to share and I am committed to listening with empathy and without judgment. My style is conversational, intuitive, and direct with each intervention grounded in evidence-based research.
I believe that successful therapy starts with a strong, collaborative relationship between the therapist and client. I understand that each one of my clients has a unique story to share and I am committed to listening with empathy and without judgment. My style is conversational, intuitive, and direct with each intervention grounded in evidence-based research.
(267) 214-6985 View (267) 214-6985
Photo of Jenna Loz, Pre-Licensed Professional in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Jenna Loz
Pre-Licensed Professional, MS, NCC
Verified Verified
3 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109
Trauma. We all experience it at some point in our lives. It’s that thing that keeps you up at night. The thing that you distract yourself from by working extra hours, scrolling endlessly on Tik-Tok, self-harm, addiction, codependency. We run, fight, freeze, fawn, shut-down. Our bodies are built to adapt to the stress in our lives but what happens when the stress is too much? When we run into obstacles like bullying, abuse, illness, separation, loss, disasters? What happens when there is no one to witness our pain? We forget about the parts of ourselves that are creative, brave, intuitive, funny, smart, kind, gentle, strong.
Trauma. We all experience it at some point in our lives. It’s that thing that keeps you up at night. The thing that you distract yourself from by working extra hours, scrolling endlessly on Tik-Tok, self-harm, addiction, codependency. We run, fight, freeze, fawn, shut-down. Our bodies are built to adapt to the stress in our lives but what happens when the stress is too much? When we run into obstacles like bullying, abuse, illness, separation, loss, disasters? What happens when there is no one to witness our pain? We forget about the parts of ourselves that are creative, brave, intuitive, funny, smart, kind, gentle, strong.
(215) 584-4511 View (215) 584-4511
Photo of Brian Hainstock, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Brian Hainstock
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, MSS, LCSW
Verified Verified
1 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
With nearly 30 years of experience doing psychotherapy and with a number of treatment approaches, we can create a working partnership that will help you address whatever is impeding your emotional growth. We welcome people from all walks of life and have experience working with a wide range of issues. In-house psychiatric evaluations and medication monitoring are also available (search for Dr Robert McFadden).
With nearly 30 years of experience doing psychotherapy and with a number of treatment approaches, we can create a working partnership that will help you address whatever is impeding your emotional growth. We welcome people from all walks of life and have experience working with a wide range of issues. In-house psychiatric evaluations and medication monitoring are also available (search for Dr Robert McFadden).
(267) 528-0937 View (267) 528-0937
Photo of Arlene G Navarro, Licensed Professional Counselor in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Arlene G Navarro
Licensed Professional Counselor, MA, LPC
Verified Verified
4 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109
If you are currently experiencing fear, stress and anxiety or suddenly shutting down and find yourself not knowing how to respond to the COVID19 pandemic, I can help. I have experience working with a wide variety of population ranging from college students to working business professionals. My goal is to walk with you, making you feel heard and understood. It is a gift to earn one's trust. I will listen to your story with great care and intentionality. My focus is to bring awareness, meaning & connection to making you feel known. I offer therapy to individual(s) and couples. I also provide group therapy.
If you are currently experiencing fear, stress and anxiety or suddenly shutting down and find yourself not knowing how to respond to the COVID19 pandemic, I can help. I have experience working with a wide variety of population ranging from college students to working business professionals. My goal is to walk with you, making you feel heard and understood. It is a gift to earn one's trust. I will listen to your story with great care and intentionality. My focus is to bring awareness, meaning & connection to making you feel known. I offer therapy to individual(s) and couples. I also provide group therapy.
(267) 863-2894 View (267) 863-2894
Photo of Susan Schack, Psychologist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Susan Schack
Psychologist, PhD
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109
Choosing a therapist is a difficult decision. Instead of telling you how I work, I decided to ask some of my patients to describe it in their words. "Susan is so down to earth that I feel like I'm talking to a good friend." "She really cares about her patients." "She makes it easy to talk about things that are very difficult to say out loud." "She is non-judgemental, kind, intelligent and professional." "After working with Susan my life is now moving in a positive direction." "Most importantly she has helped me to parlay the skills we've worked on into my life."
Choosing a therapist is a difficult decision. Instead of telling you how I work, I decided to ask some of my patients to describe it in their words. "Susan is so down to earth that I feel like I'm talking to a good friend." "She really cares about her patients." "She makes it easy to talk about things that are very difficult to say out loud." "She is non-judgemental, kind, intelligent and professional." "After working with Susan my life is now moving in a positive direction." "Most importantly she has helped me to parlay the skills we've worked on into my life."
(646) 681-7594 View (646) 681-7594
Photo of Innovatel Medical, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Innovatel Medical
Clinical Social Work/Therapist
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109  (Online Only)
At Innovatel Medical our expert team of providers bring tailored mental wellness right to your home via telehealth. Your behavioral health needs are specific to you, and your care should be, too. From therapy services to medication assistance and prescribing, our accessible virtual services are your passport to a happier, healthier you – all from the comfort of your home. Don't let your mental health struggles hold you back; let us help guide you through your own unique journey of success and well-being.
At Innovatel Medical our expert team of providers bring tailored mental wellness right to your home via telehealth. Your behavioral health needs are specific to you, and your care should be, too. From therapy services to medication assistance and prescribing, our accessible virtual services are your passport to a happier, healthier you – all from the comfort of your home. Don't let your mental health struggles hold you back; let us help guide you through your own unique journey of success and well-being.
(267) 490-3963 View (267) 490-3963
Photo of Dr. Jeff J. Rocker, Licensed Professional Counselor in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Dr. Jeff J. Rocker
Licensed Professional Counselor, PhD, NCC, LPC, LMHC, LCPC
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19109
With 12 years of experience working with clients going through individual, relationship, and family issues, Celebrity Therapist Dr. Jeff Rocker has provided therapeutic services to clients nationwide. He is Licensed in 14 states and has served clients from all age groups. Over the years, Dr. Jeff has organized lectures and various events in the community, including excursions and retreats for couples to improve their communication and better understand each other. He has experience working with athletes in the NFL, NBA, and MLB. In addition, Dr. Jeff has also worked with clients in the Movie, Music, and Entertainment Industries.
With 12 years of experience working with clients going through individual, relationship, and family issues, Celebrity Therapist Dr. Jeff Rocker has provided therapeutic services to clients nationwide. He is Licensed in 14 states and has served clients from all age groups. Over the years, Dr. Jeff has organized lectures and various events in the community, including excursions and retreats for couples to improve their communication and better understand each other. He has experience working with athletes in the NFL, NBA, and MLB. In addition, Dr. Jeff has also worked with clients in the Movie, Music, and Entertainment Industries.
(484) 249-0659 View (484) 249-0659
Photo of Michael Dean Kaltenbach, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Michael Dean Kaltenbach
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, DSW, LCSW
Not Verified Not Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
Oftentimes, people just need someone to listen to them, to help them work through an issue, and sort out their feelings. That's where I come in as a licensed psychotherapist as well as a medical social worker. I'm skilled at hearing what people are saying and helping them to figure out strategies for improving their situation. I work with a variety of clients ---men, women and children from all sexualities, gender identities, and races to help them with all sorts of issues. My clientele ranges in ages; however, a majority of my clients are in their early 30's.
Oftentimes, people just need someone to listen to them, to help them work through an issue, and sort out their feelings. That's where I come in as a licensed psychotherapist as well as a medical social worker. I'm skilled at hearing what people are saying and helping them to figure out strategies for improving their situation. I work with a variety of clients ---men, women and children from all sexualities, gender identities, and races to help them with all sorts of issues. My clientele ranges in ages; however, a majority of my clients are in their early 30's.
(323) 510-3581 View (323) 510-3581
Photo of Stephen Becker, Clinical Social Work/Therapist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Stephen Becker
Clinical Social Work/Therapist, MSW, LCSW
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
I see my job as a therapist as providing a particular kind of space. A space that helps people to feel comfortable, and one that helps people to talk. It is through this talking that healing and transformation become possible. I believe that human beings have a natural tendency to move towards growth, maturity, and happiness. Sometimes, however, things happen in life that trip us up. Things get in our way. These obstacles can be diminished, weakened, and removed through the therapeutic process. That's what therapy is; the removal of what stands in the way of our movement towards our goals, desires, and dreams.
I see my job as a therapist as providing a particular kind of space. A space that helps people to feel comfortable, and one that helps people to talk. It is through this talking that healing and transformation become possible. I believe that human beings have a natural tendency to move towards growth, maturity, and happiness. Sometimes, however, things happen in life that trip us up. Things get in our way. These obstacles can be diminished, weakened, and removed through the therapeutic process. That's what therapy is; the removal of what stands in the way of our movement towards our goals, desires, and dreams.
(215) 600-2182 View (215) 600-2182
Photo of Barry Zakireh, Psychologist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Barry Zakireh
Psychologist, PhD
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
My client and service focus is on individuals or entities seeking treatment, psychological evaluations, risk assessment, expert witness representation, and related services for sexual misconduct, sexual abuse, sexual victimization, or trauma. Other areas of specialty include assessment of violence; standards of professional practice; program development; supervision and training of forensic practitioners; treatment or supervision of professionals and clergy with sexual misconduct; pretrial defendants; juveniles delinquency and sexual offending; and supervision or training of clinical personnel involved in various relevant psychological, civil, or criminal justice interventions. Also, I have extensive training in treatment of general psychological conditions as well as providing psychological and psycho-educational evaluations.
My client and service focus is on individuals or entities seeking treatment, psychological evaluations, risk assessment, expert witness representation, and related services for sexual misconduct, sexual abuse, sexual victimization, or trauma. Other areas of specialty include assessment of violence; standards of professional practice; program development; supervision and training of forensic practitioners; treatment or supervision of professionals and clergy with sexual misconduct; pretrial defendants; juveniles delinquency and sexual offending; and supervision or training of clinical personnel involved in various relevant psychological, civil, or criminal justice interventions. Also, I have extensive training in treatment of general psychological conditions as well as providing psychological and psycho-educational evaluations.
(267) 871-9901 View (267) 871-9901
Photo of Anna Stewart, Pre-Licensed Professional in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Anna Stewart
Pre-Licensed Professional, MFT
Verified Verified
1 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
Anna Stewart is a graduate of Thomas Jefferson University’s Couple and Family Therapy Program with a concentration in sex therapy. She is a systemically-oriented therapist who has experience working with individuals, couples, and families. She specializes in distressed couples with one or both individuals experiencing diagnoses such as depression, and anxiety. She has a background in sex education and enjoys working with teens and young adults navigating their social and romantic relationships. She also specializes in clients that are working in the food and beverage service industry, a population she is well-acquainted with.
Anna Stewart is a graduate of Thomas Jefferson University’s Couple and Family Therapy Program with a concentration in sex therapy. She is a systemically-oriented therapist who has experience working with individuals, couples, and families. She specializes in distressed couples with one or both individuals experiencing diagnoses such as depression, and anxiety. She has a background in sex education and enjoys working with teens and young adults navigating their social and romantic relationships. She also specializes in clients that are working in the food and beverage service industry, a population she is well-acquainted with.
(301) 691-4193 View (301) 691-4193
Photo of Tanya Hess, Psychologist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Tanya Hess
Psychologist, PhD
Verified Verified
2 Endorsed
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
I am a licensed psychologist located in Center City and have been treating patients in the Philadelphia area since 2007. I work with individuals, couples, children and families. I have trained in psychodynamic, interpersonal and cognitive-behavioral therapies. My research and practice specialties include personality assessment, eating disorders, and working with family systems. In treatment, I focus on using my understanding of human behavior to help my patients better understand what thoughts and wishes motivate them as well as what fears or anxieties might be getting in their way.
I am a licensed psychologist located in Center City and have been treating patients in the Philadelphia area since 2007. I work with individuals, couples, children and families. I have trained in psychodynamic, interpersonal and cognitive-behavioral therapies. My research and practice specialties include personality assessment, eating disorders, and working with family systems. In treatment, I focus on using my understanding of human behavior to help my patients better understand what thoughts and wishes motivate them as well as what fears or anxieties might be getting in their way.
(215) 600-3687 View (215) 600-3687
Photo of Noël K Bruno, Psychologist in Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA
Noël K Bruno
Psychologist, PsyD
Verified Verified
Midtown Village, Philadelphia, PA 19107
I am a licensed clinical psychologist with more than 20 years experience in the field treating child, adolescent, and adult clients in residential, outpatient, and private practice settings. Additionally, I am well versed at providing mental health evaluations and expert witness testimony for clients who are involved in a litigation process. My style is direct yet nurturing. I work in a flexible manner, inviting clients to come alone or bring whomever will support them into their sessions. My ideal client is the one who completes the first difficult step of calling for an appointment.
I am a licensed clinical psychologist with more than 20 years experience in the field treating child, adolescent, and adult clients in residential, outpatient, and private practice settings. Additionally, I am well versed at providing mental health evaluations and expert witness testimony for clients who are involved in a litigation process. My style is direct yet nurturing. I work in a flexible manner, inviting clients to come alone or bring whomever will support them into their sessions. My ideal client is the one who completes the first difficult step of calling for an appointment.
(267) 388-4840 View (267) 388-4840

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Borderline Personality (BPD) Therapists

What is the most successful approach to treating borderline personality disorder?

Dialectical behavior therapy (DBT) is considered the gold standard of treatment for borderline personality disorder. An evidence-based treatment, it addresses the extreme emotional reactivity, the relationship difficulties, and the acts of self-harm that create so much distress for BPD patients. DBT is a comprehensive program that includes both regular individual psychotherapy sessions and weekly group sessions of skills training.

What happens in treatment of borderline personality disorder?

Treatment typically consists of weekly individual therapy sessions that last an hour and group skill-focused instructional sessions that may last up to two hours. Patients are typically given homework “assignments” in which they are asked to practice in their daily life the skills they acquire in therapy. Patients also keep a diary tracking their emotions and impulses as a way to know which situations are most problematic and to help them gain control over their own behavior. Difficult situations and feelings are typically reviewed in therapy sessions and more constructive solutions found.

What kinds of problems does BPD treatment help with?

DBT was initially developed to dampen the self-destructive impulses of chronically suicidal patients. It is now the treatment of choice for borderline personality disorder, a serious condition marked by extreme emotional reactivity, relationship instability, and self-injurious behaviors. Treatment of BPD helps patients tolerate the flux of emotions without acting on them, often with a specific focus on tolerating negative emotions. DBT addresses the core problems of BPD—fear of abandonment, low self-esteem, and impulsivity.

What is the goal of treatment in borderline personality disorder?

The goal of treatment for borderline personality disorder (BPD) is to relieve the extreme emotional distress that patients experience—to curb their emotional reactivity, to minimize their inclination to self-harm, and to reduce their impulsivity. Toward these ends, patients are not only taught an array of new coping skills and techniques for emotional regulation, they are given opportunities to practice them. Another major goal of treatment is interpersonal effectiveness; patients learn and problem-solve ways to effectively communicate in relationships, especially how to ask for what they need as a way to minimize hurt feelings.