Russell B. Lemle Ph.D.

About

Russell B. Lemle, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist whose private practice exclusively specializes in couples/marital psychotherapy. For over three decades years, he served on the supervising clinical faculty of the Dept of Psychiatry, University of California San Francisco. His publications pertaining to relationships have appeared in the Journal of Marriage and the Family and the Journal of Community Psychology in addition to his popular Psychology Today blogs. He is the former Chief Psychologist of the San Francisco VA and is co-founder and senior policy analyst for the Veterans Healthcare Policy Institute.

Recent Posts

The Secret to Resolving Relationship Conflict: Co-Regulating

When we get dysregulated, we instinctively try to regain our own equilibrium. That can cause trouble for relationships. The secret is learning to "co-regulate" instead.

How Threat Emotions Cause Us to Misread Our Partner

Whenever we’re anxious or angry, we’re prone to misread our partner. By learning to recognize how emotions shape perceptions, we can restore connection.

How Being Entitled to Our Way - Gets in the Way

Why do relationship differences spiral into conflict? Too often, it’s because we claim we’re entitled to our preference, i.e. we should get our way, even without our partner’s buy-in, because our justification has greater weight and relevance. Here are the 15 entitlements at the root of relationship friction, and suggested alternatives that build mutual respect.