There's new evidence that depression is not just a disorder of the mind.
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About 8 years ago I had an accident that put me in hospitals with a brain injury. To sum it up I was with a group of friends, drinking, on a terrace and when I got up from the chair I was sitting on and started walking towards the railing, I stumbled. Being as drunk as I was, I wasn't able to catch my balance and the railing wasn't bolted up correctly so over I went, 10-12 feet head first. I was only in hospitals for 3 1/2 months, the doctors didn't know if I was going to make it or not and if I did, what my condition would be.
Since the recovery that took place, physically nothing changed, motor skills are the same if not better and they were good to begin with. I still play sports and exercise without a problem.
But back then I had great self confidence and didn't care what anyone thought of me. Love me or hate me, it didn't matter. But after the recovery I noticed the differences in how people treat(ed) me and talk(ed) to me from how they used to and how they did after the accident happened. Not one of them had the guts to have a genuine conversation with me and I was able to tell by their mannerisms when we would talk that they were being very touch and go. Annoying, but I didn't feel like calling them out and getting into a pointless conversation/argument.
My biggest issue is my self confidence/worth and that I care too much about what I think others think of me, which in turn direct help my self confidence/worth. There are many times when I want to be brutally honest with them and call it how I see it but being that I feel that way and I'm very anti confrontational, I just remove myself from the situation. But then I get annoyed and pissed off at myself for not just saying it and getting it over with regardless of the outcome.
So I'm frustrated and not sure exactly how to go about basically being done with that part of me. Any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance,
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