Christmas will never be the same again for me.Last September my mom was diagnosed with cancer on its 3rd stage which had surprised me because my mom seems to have kept her sickness a secret. As far as my memory is concerned, I think we celebrated Christmas with my mom only once because she and dad had some issues and had to separate. My mom went abroad in the middle east I was only 6 yrs old I can only remember spending at least 3x with my mom till I was in college. After college well after almost 10yrs, my mom and dad got back and my mom stayed with us for about 2 to 3 years and went to abroad again in the US where she spends yet another 10yrs and counting. So again I did not spend that much time with her then her illness had doubled the pain; she is now undergoing treatment as I am telling her story. She went abroad only for one thing: to work and to work hard as hell in order for us to live. When my mom and dad separated my mom went on having her own family. I have 2 step sisters with a family of their own and my mom also supports their everyday needs. My wanted to go home long time ago but she said she cannot because her love ones are so dependent on her. Now all those working long ours, thinking of her love ones far away, spending almost all of her life living alone and so far away made so much toll on her mind and body which I think led to her present illness. My mom is fighting the fight of her life. She said she wanted to continue living not for herself but for us. She already discussed to me a glimpse of her will that before anything else I should look out for my sister and my sister's family. After her therapy hopefully she will return home early next year not knowing what to expect in life, a life fighting for hope. I did not spend that much time with my mom but I truly love her with all my heart and soul. I have regretted the time when I was mean to her and so sorry for not treating her the right way a mother should be treated. This is my saddest Christmas ever not because my mom is suffering cancer but knowing that I cannot do anything to change this. If i have one wish this Christmas I would tell the Lord to extend my mom's life in exchange for mine because my life could not amount to the love that my mom gave us. So people reading this may I request a prayer for my wish...please do so..Thank you and God bless