My mom tried over time to make me hate my Dad. Her main weapons were:
limiting contact with that parent
forcing child to reject the other parent
creating the impression that the other parent is dangerous
forcing the child to choose

Over time I learned that she was full of lies. For example, my Dad NEVER once hit me, but my mom did on multiple occasions. Funny thing, the one time I fought back, she told me that I "assulted" her even though she ran at me fist flying. That was when I knew what she had put my Dad through. All those times that she said that my Dad assulted her were probably self defense on his part. One time the cops came and they were like "If he assulted you, then why is he bleeding and you don't have a scratch?" My Dad stopped them from putting her in jail. Knowing what I know now, that was a mistake.

I only saw my Dad once a week or so, but that also worked out better for him. I didn't see many of his flaws until after he died.

My mom would put me in impossible situations where I would have to choose between her and him. My Dad never made me choose. He once asked if I wanted to live with him. I said no because I worried that my mom would kill herself if I left her. My Dad accepted my choice and didn't question my judgement. He said that I could always live with him, but he wanted me to go where I wanted.

My Dad made mistakes and had his faults but I think that anyone with such a messed up wife would break down too.

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