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This is a great explanation. I am teaching my daughter this gradually. As a four year old she faces agony every day, from not getting what she wants for breakfast to what clothes to wear, because there are times that what she wants is not available/ not appropriate. I let her know that she'll be okay anyway even if she has to wear clothes she doesn't like, and I don't show much concern for her wailing and thrashing about. I see that as practice expressing herself, and hopefully as she gets herself expressed she will graduallly take my cue and not put much emotional energy into the hated pair of jeans over the too-short dress!
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