Values are what bring distinction to your life. You don't find them, you choose them. And when you do, you're on the path to fulfillment.
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It sounds like you made the common mistake about compassion during your marriage but that you got it right now. That's wonderful. Here's a post that addresses the common confusion about compassion in relationships. http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/anger-in-the-age-entitlement/200911/anger-in-marriage-ii-fear-compassion
Couples often confuse the two.
In proximity to a contemptuous person or blog post, you could get infected.
Develop the former, embrace the latter.
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