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I have been a HEAVY opiate addict for over ten years now. I wanted to comment to your post as it sounds very similar to what I go through only with a different substance.
I have quite cold turkey, on my own, more times than I can count. I'm not talking a vicodin habit either. Just to feel well I need a half gram of very good heroin, or 100mg of oxycodone. If I want to feel good double those dosages.
The longest period of sobriety I have had so far was when I moved about three and a half years ago. I wasn't physically addicted for over a year. As you described, not a day went by where I felt "normal". I wasn't dope sick, but I was in a different kind of hell where nothing made me happy and I revolved around anxiety every waking second.
I am now on methadone maintenence, and been clean from other opiates for almost six months now. I see many people coming in getting on the juice because they got "hooked" on vicodin or a low dose of oxycodone.
These people don't realize that methadone is a last resort that should only be reserved for "lifers" that have used so long and so heavily like myself that they will never fully recover without medicated assistance. Once you're on the juice, you are never going to be the same.
Anyways, I bring this up because it sounds like you are in a similar situation with a different substance. My questions for you are
Have you worked with a doctor to find medication that may help after you combat the initial Withdrawl?
When you quit previously did you try any prescribed meds to ease the symptoms you described?
If not, I would highly recommend doing so. Best of luck to you my friend. Both meth and heroin are known as the hardest drugs on the planet for a reason. Trying to compare the two and say one is worse, is like saying it's better to get lung cancer the than a brain tumor.
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