No matter how determined anyone is to eliminate the conditions that foster love, they cannot make them go away. There are natural laws in the universe that no mortal being has been given the power to change. Love is among those things regulated by natural laws. A great percentage of humankind who desires that love were a constant may attempt to eradicate the laws that regulate love, but they will be no more successful than if they tried to stop the earth from rotating in an effort to keep the sun from going down. The only thing they can do is shift the control of those conditions from one person to another, but they can never eliminate them. Because the premise of unconditional love is so widely accepted, it is understandable that the general population would believe that mere mortal man has the power to eliminate the natural laws of love. Few give any serious or deep thought as to what they are actually assuming. Eventually, they will have to come face to face with that decision; those who continue to believe they have such incredible power have placed themselves on the same level as Deity. Talk about being delusional and narcissistic.

True story: “Susan” was raised in a home where her father withdrew his love and affection at will, causing her a great deal of emotional pain and a loss of self esteem. In the classic unconditional love relationship, which this was, he also demanded that the children love him in spite of the pain he caused them. Susan felt that her father’s love for her was conditional, therefore, when she had a family of her own, she decided that she wanted her family to be different and so she demanded to be loved unconditionally. The problem was that, in demanding from her children that she be loved unconditionally, she denied her children the same consideration she was denied as a child. In essence, and unknown to her, she parented exactly like her father that she learned to hate. Her children were unfulfilled because their own needs weren’t being heard, considered or met. They were not allowed to express their disapproval in her as a parent or even express their needs to her because that would violate her demands for unconditional love. Once they became old enough that they couldn’t be controlled any longer, they chose to exercise their only option; they decided to rebel. To exacerbate Susan’s situation, with her now rebellious children, she felt that she was a failure as a parent. Because her childhood feelings of failure were still fresh in her mind, the added feelings of failure as a parent all but destroyed her emotionally. Her children ended up with teenage pregnancy as well as getting into trouble with the law. She ended up with an even lower self esteem, eventually becoming suicidal and in acute psychotherapy. As a result of the illusion of unconditional love, Susan ended up feeling even more unloved and alone than ever before.

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