Hello, no i wasn't always feeling like that. It's been quite a battle. It started as anger after i returned to the states. Started talking to the Va mental health professionals when it got worse. Been on a few meds. Currently i'm also taking meds for my heart after a botched VA surgery and meds for nerve damage after the Doctors injured my nerve cluster on my left side. Did take gabapentin but stopped because i was suicidal as you can see from my older post my pistol was looking pretty good. I talked to all of my doctors and they finally got me off of the gabapentin and the venlafaxine. I'm still having bad nightmares though, each day is a struggle and i'll admit I do feel alone even when amongst my family. I cannot go into a Wal-Mart and tend to rush through when out in public but i am trying.

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