This is tremendous insight into the mind of a masochist.

As a masochist myself with also a foot fetish (quite the concoction), in high school I would be taking a math exam while looking at the feet of girls sitting infront of me and I'd take pleasure in knowing that they were doing well on the exam, especially when they got up to hand in the exam and leave the classroom before me. If they were also beautiful and had gorgeous feet, it only made the satisfaction more intense.

The result: A boy with reduced focus at the task of hand because he's extremely aroused

And this is just one example.

Fast forward a few years later, I found that my masochistic fantasies would at times interfere with the person I wanted to be (as stated by someone here, the rush from this fantasy is extremely addicting). So instead of deriving pleasure from regular situations, I decided that I would try hooking up with women who were dominant, or ones that had qualities that could make me feel humiliated. However, after finally finding a woman who WAS dominant, a sadist, and fulfilled certain masochistic fantasies of mine, I felt extremely empty. Even though the orgasm was intense, afterwards, at the core of my being, I didn't feel good.

Before going on this conquest to find a woman specifically for fulfilling my masochistic desires, I had a girlfriend that I loved (we split for other reasons, completely unrelated to any of this) and she would indulge me in these fantasies. Afterwards we would embrace each other. After all, it was just a fantasy, we loved each other very much, and life would go on harmoniously afterwards.

So in conclusion:
I (me personally) do find that the HEALTHIEST way to deal with these masochistic urges, is to find a partner that you truly love, one that will truly accept you, and explain your fantasies to him/her. How intense the fantasy feels depends on what she's comfortable with and how far she's willing to go for you. If you explain it properly and it gets crazy enough, the rush and pleasure will still the same, extremely intense and pleasurable. And at the end of it instead of being in a place of lonliness and darkness, you'll have each other. And that's much better.

Just my 2 cents.
James

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