I think there's possibly an error in the article. In paragraph 2, you state that the anxiously attached might seek to get needs met outside of the relationship, whereas those with avoidant attachment may just not feel connected in the first place, which leads them outside the relationship. In paragraph 5 you state that the anxiously attached would be the least likely to cheat according to initial studies, and that this is a point you are repeating from earlier..

Moving on anyway to the later study you discuss, I find it interesting that the anxiously attached were more likely to cheat, or be cheated on. Anecdotally, as someone who recognises patterns of anxious attachment in myself, I don't find it to affect my own faithfulness. I pretty much view fidelity as being more closely associated with each person's character and/or personal values, than with the dynamics of the relationship; there is usually always the option to leave the relationship, rather than choose to betray and belie it. What's interesting though, is that I do have a history of my serious relationships ending due to my partner's infidelity!

Again, because I view faithfulness as more to do with the person either choosing to value that trait in themselves or not, I wonder if what is actually going on (in the cases where the anxiously attached is the one cheated on), is that these anxiously attached people are being attracted to, and ending up in marriages with, partners who are more likely to be unfaithful to them purely because of the type of person they already are upon entering the relationship.

I could definitely be completely off here as I'm building this hypothesis from my own experiences, but I have realised with much reflection after my breakups, that my last 2 serious relationships (out of a total of 4), were with men who both displayed in time, a very large number of narcissistic traits. I loved the way they idealised me in the first 6-12 months together, and they (initially) loved my need for reassurance from them (I'm guessing because it fed into their need for constant attention and admiration).

Narcissists and those high in narcissistic traits are usually promiscuous and unfaithful from what I've read, so it wasn't really surprising I guess that they both ended up cheating when I was no longer new/exciting, or meeting their constant need for admiration (both cheated at approximately the 1 year mark).

I'd be interested in any thoughts on my speculations, if anyone happens to read this.

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