Values are what bring distinction to your life. You don't find them, you choose them. And when you do, you're on the path to fulfillment.
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Don't know whether you're aware of it but you seem to be describing a narcissistic personality disorder as much as a very angry person. You might want to do a little research on the former, to see whether it might offer you some new ideas about your sister and how best to deal with her.
How couples “exert” themselves for their partner before getting married.
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