To start, we need a bit if emotional intelligence to recognize the need for more of it. Once that happens, we can start to work on the gain.

I personally have found (particularly in the last couple of months) that my deep dislike of my former boss, has caused me to have instant automatic hatred of women who resemble her in any way. This leads me to treat them differently, initially, and overall makes me uncomfortable.

Having realized this, I'm not quite sure how to shift the mentality and even more so, how to shift the emotional response tied to this visual stimuli.

I am determined to, though. Because in the grand scheme of it all, it is zapping me of my energy and yielding me nothing positive.

The part in this article where it says to basically avoid the people who cause you stress (paraphrased) has been my best solution, thus far.