My mother has asked forgiveness for the pain she put me through by aligning herself to a church and devoting more of her life to her God than to her children, of forcing me to abide my the church's rules rather than her own perspective, and by not facing her own mental illness and leaving me drowning in mine. But her apology and her explanation of her reasons for clinging to God after she divorced my father, of wanting me to be as dependent on Him as she was only brought sadness rather than relief. And now, as a mom myself, I see my own shortcomings, my own demands on my children based on my insecurities, I write poetry apologizing to my children so that when they are adults, they too can forgive me.