Thank you Dr Heitler,
Most appreicative and helpful answer and certainly has made me think further .
I lost my partner in a homicide not so long ago, he was my world and my security and sense of beloinging is shattered. I am anxious when someone mentioned the word narcissitic behaviour to me, as people with types of eating disorders can also carry these charesteristics, but I know for me I just dont want to burden or be in the way of others.

I know the loss has made me feel so insecure and self esteem has dropped dramatically and my days are I feel seld absorbed in how I feel and I have so much troubl relating to the rest of the world and I feel very guilty about this .

Your answer has been helpful, and I also wonder if most of the population carry some narcissitic behaviour, would it be so hard to define when it becomes abnormal.

I can understand if therapists are not able to tell the person if they they have it, I just hope they dont judge

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