I've been intrigued that while many narcissists are hopelessly defensive, some delight me with their openness. Some, maybe most, want the other person to be blamed for all; yet some truly do have insight potential that they from time to time are able to turn on.

And some do a sudden flip. Though for years they were unremittingly defensive and blaming, when their spouse announces she (or he) is leaving, suddenly they make a mad rush to grow up....and really do succeed in discovering that there's two people, not just them, in the relationship!

Thanks so much for adding your important comment on the Narc tendency to mistakenly label attempts to help them learn and grow as attacks and insults.

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