I would argue that I am not the one who should be defending the different experiences of people who are not white, not cis, or not straight. That would fall under the responsibility of the author of this article. There is a way for writing to be inclusive to people of all genders and sexualities, one example of which is not using restrictive language. The phrase that caught my attention above was 'the man takes the lead', or using that language and acknowledging that our system is binary and acknowledging the way that restricts certain views of relationships. Because what happens when there is no man in a relationship? What if there are two? What if neither party falls into the gender binary?

There is something called the 'Gender Binary' that exists in much of the world. The gender binary is a social construct which labels men as masculine (strong, doesn't cry, doesn't wear dresses, etc.), having a penis/testicles, and not being feminine. The same for females; feminine (soft, dainty, etc.), breasts/vagina, and not masculine. The crossing, or exploration of anything against the binary, results in aggression and punishment. Children who cross the binary are picked on, bullied, and sometimes killed. Historically, many ancient societies recognized more than two genders (as do some current societies, up to 5 different genders). Some people identify as gender fluid. Gender expression doesn't have to do with you genetalia. Frankly, the United States tends to have a strange preoccupation with other people's genitals.

I acknowledge that my experience as a white woman is different than the experience of an asian woman or a woman with darker skin than me, here in the United States. I have seen them treated differently than me, I know that I have privileges that they do not have (for example, I know that white people will always be well-represented in 99% of any given magazine, TV show, news website, or scientific website that I indulge in, while these other women do not have that luxury). I understand that this cultural difference affects flirting and dating.

I don't understand why you would use the words 'mongoloid' or 'negroid' as they are very offensive and outdated words. I also don't know why you would include that you 'should be offended' but aren't. Congratulations? That was not an offensive statement.

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