Values are what bring distinction to your life. You don't find them, you choose them. And when you do, you're on the path to fulfillment.
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I'm so sorry you're experiencing this unpleasant detachment and apparent set of judgments from your friend and her family member. Sounds hurtful.
Have you been able to talk to your friend and hear what she has to say about it? Do we know why specifically she's pulling back? Doesn't mean you can definitely do anything about it, but there might be something that can be addressed and worked out.
And what does family mean to her vs. a long standing friend? Does she feel her family understands her better, is more in her court protecting her as a team member? What is it about this family member in particular that sways her?
Wow. A lot to try to understand. You have my compassion for the hurt. Take really good care of yourself and remember that you're a lovable human being. I'm happy to help if you'd like to work on it.
With love, Sharon
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