Values are what bring distinction to your life. You don't find them, you choose them. And when you do, you're on the path to fulfillment.
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It's interesting to consider this point of view. I find it overgeneralized, like the whole Tannen thesis. That is perhaps inevitable in a short blog post, especially one where the premise being refuted is itself overgeneralized ("men don't listen...")
To be more specific about this, I am a woman who, all my life, has found that venting my feelings without seeking a solution to the underlying problem is extremely unsatisfying and in fact makes the bad feelings worse. When I talk about my feelings, it is almost always in order to discuss how to solve the underlying problem. And I have recognized that I (wrongly) expect others --- male and female -- to want the same. I think it's good to discern what approach the other person wants and respect it, but I don't think you can assume you know, based on the other person's sex.
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