Rebuilding American Greatness: One Dollar = One Vote
It's time to reinvent American democracy.
Posted Aug 30, 2012
How can we return America to greatness?
We know our country is in trouble. Our fiscal debt cliff is a rising Everest; poisonous political polarization prevents progress; laughable infrastructure tumbles into rivers and seas; our health statistics rival Cuba.
We know the magic of the market moves mountains. Now we should use that magic to incentive democracy while reinventing American politics and competitiveness.
Return to the simplicity beloved of our founding fathers — every dollar paid in taxes to Federal and state treasuries equals one vote.
Taxes will stop being viewed as money down a rathole, but become a direct expression of political influence. Our new democratic system should cause budget deficits to shrink — even disappear. Citizens and corporations will stop wasting money on SuperPacs and “social welfare” groups. Their tax dollars will transform directly into nation-building power, buying the kind of government that renews our country.
No longer will wealth creators like Mike Bloomberg spend $100 million on stupid campaign ads, kissing babies while slathering their arms and necks with industrial strength Purell. A quick get together with like minded entrepreneurial, successful individuals, and elections will be decided quickly and cleanly. No longer will industrious businessmen waste time on complex trusts cumbrously converted into Cayman IRAs. Corporations will take their tax avoiding overseas accounts and gladly give them back to the nation, certain they can elect leaders who recognize the business of America is business.
How It Will Work
Nominations will be conduced like the NFL draft. Worthy candidates will be vetted by scouts appointed through the most prominent companies and individuals.
American elections will become the Greatest Entertainment Spectacle Ever! No sports event can possibly compete. Power Week will transform international media, making the Olympics and the SuperBowl look like Snooki’s Rutgers commencement speech.
Throughout Power Week, 24/7 videos of all candidates will capture each fascinating second of our newly transparent politics. Embedded sports/newscasters will follow each every candidate as they make deals with the nation’s power brokers, deeply engaging the electorate in a realtime reality show. Now every American can watch, in their living rooms, how American power really works.
Television and media rights to Power Week will go beyond colossal, as people across the world will watch the globe’s most powerful nation remake policy and democracy right in front of the cameras.
And every of the many billions of dollars in media rights for Power Week will be earmarked to immediately reduce the Federal budget deficit.
We can’t lose.
Americans no longer trust their national leaders. It’s time for Congress to rebrand.
The best American designers will cooperate to create new aesthetic masterpieces. Art and fashion will effervescently combine in the new uniforms worn in chambers and in public by our senators and representatives, as each man and woman dons the gorgeous political logos of the corporations and individuals who got them elected. This massive increase in democratic transparency will further aid our stricken Treasury when they are cross-marketed to fashion chains worldwide.
As the Supreme Court rightly pointed out in the Citizen’s United Decision, corporations are people — the teams that work, innovate, producing useful knowledge and jobs, the very wealth and lifeblood of the nation. Now corporations will become recognized for what they really are — special citizens with special, irredeemable rights.
For simplicity, corporations will only be allowed to vote in a single state. Chevron might decide to control Wyoming’s two senators, while Exxon might use its tax dollars to sensibly acquire power in New Jersey or even Texas. Corporate gender will require careful selection. Male corporations trying to merge with other male corporations might be forced to relocate to states allowing same-sex marriage. Doubtless the Supreme Court will clarify this important issue.
Solving Illegal Immigration Through Corporate Adoption
No one knows what to do with our many millions of illegal immigrants. The answer is simple — make them earn citizenship competitively and productively. Corporations will be encouraged to adopt large numbers of illegal aliens. After periods of five to ten years spent under the careful tutelage of their corporate parents, the powers and privileges of earned citizenship will open to these new Americans. And programs like “Exxon Adopts” will showcase the innumerable beneficial effects of our greatest corporations.
Making dollars paid directly convert into votes will provoke an American industrial revolution. Knowing that wealth immediately translates into political power, Americans everywhere will quickly strive to become rich.
Nonetheless, some will be left behind. Instead of receiving welfare and expensive medical treatment for doing absolutely nothing, unemployed Americans will need to work. The hundreds of thousands of unemployed masters degree holders and tens of thousands of unemployed Ph.Ds will become legally recruited into the government bureaucracy. Paid with food stamps, costly Medicaid benefits, and austere but livable accommodations, they will replace feather-bedding placeholders whose rule loving idiocies hobble business innovation, and whose impossibly rich retirement benefits threaten to bankrupt the Treasury.
As Professor Hendrick Serrie has pointed out, the national WorkTax will not constitute slavery. Issues of ethnic origin or skin color will never be a consideration, as the unemployed happily perform their patriotic duty rebuilding the nation for the greater good of all.
We need a return to the values of our Founding Fathers — virtue, courage, loyalty, fortitude and resolution. Reforming democracy through one dollar = one vote will transform America. Once again we will be the most exceptional nation, the shining city on the hill, defining a glorious future for all the other nations.
Greatness beckons us again – if we are courageous enough to seize it.