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Your post made me think of how difficult it is for the rejected partner to avoid pursuing the rejecting partner, even to the point of personal humiliation. It may be that the pain of this humiliation is less than the pain of ultimate rejection.
Debby Herbenick Ph.D., M.P.H.
Love, desire and sexual attraction weave stories of bliss when they're reciprocated, but what happens when they're not? As much as we may wish it to be otherwise so, some people may not want to "play" with us in the way we want them to: as a date, a boyfriend, a partner, a wife. What do we do when the person we want doesn't want us back?
Early on, children have to endure the sad, frustrating lesson that certain children may not want to play with them. They may not get invited to a classmate's party and the child who they have a crush on may not like them back. In fact, the crush may even be convinced that the child in question has the cooties.
As we grow up, we continue to learn this difficult lesson. We may not get a Valentine's card shoved in our desk from the one person we hoped would send their love. The person we pine after may be taken and unable to play, romantically or sexually, in the ways that we hope. The kiss we offer may be greeted with a turned cheek rather than the lips—or worse, an awkward wave goodnight. Or we may be taken and someone else may not be able to reach out to us, even if we want them to carry us away with kisses and dreams, or even a mundane Sunday spent doing the laundry and rubbing each other's feet. The list goes on: he may not, as the book and movie say, be that "into" you. She may like you "as a friend." He may want you only as a booty call and not as a soul mate. She may want you only as long as you do X, Y, or Z.
These moments of unreturned love or lust may be tough. Scratch that—they may feel gut-wrenchingly sad, confusing, bare, lonely, and vulnerable. And yet they are a tough reality of togetherness and separateness. Sometimes the person you most want to play with—to love, to touch, to kiss, to bathe with—doesn't want to play your game. Sometimes it's even harder: they may choose to not even talk to you anymore.
And yet we can't control what other people decide to do with their lives. Not only can we not control it but sometimes the kindest, most compassionate response is to acknowledge that whatever the other person chose is perhaps best for them at the moment. Maybe they are not trying to be cruel. Perhaps they know themselves quite well and they've decided that they can't look into your eyes, take your phone calls, or come home to you anymore. Sometimes people won't play with us and we are forced to be OK with it, especially if it's what helps the other person to move on with their life.
There's no doubt about it: unrequited love and lust are hard. Research has shown how different an experience it is (in terms of brain activity) compared to love that's returned. Not that most of us need a scientist to tell them that: if you've loved and loved back, and another time loved and been left in the lurch, you know all too well what the difference is. You know how endings or breakups feel. And you may also know that moment in time when you decide it's okay that you or they decided to leave the relationship. That it was OK to move on, to not always be there for the other person or to stop taking their calls so often or listening to their longing for you.
That's not to say that one should always give up: there is something to be said for insisting someone talk to you, for asking for a second (or tenth) chance, for getting on a train or a plane and saying "I want to try" or coming home and saying "I know sex is out of the question, but can I just hold you? Can we kiss?" But how to tell one from another? Now that's the mystery of love and of lust, isn't it?
If you're moving on from a breakup, a divorce, or other relationship heartbreak, check out How to Survive the Loss of a Love. In upcoming posts, we'll also explore some concrete tips on how to move on gracefully and also how to re-connect with a partner.
Learn more about Debby Herbenick at MySexProfessor.com.
To me, it wasn't that the
Submitted by Anonymous on May 24, 2018 - 9:16pm
To me, it wasn't that the pain of humiliation was less than the pain of ultimate rejection. It was less than the pain of not being able to make her smile, or to care for her.
However, I learned that I was caring for her the wrong way. When someone wants you to leave, the most caring thing to do is to leave.
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pursuing and humiliation
Submitted by Debby Herbenick Ph.D., M.P.H. on November 3, 2009 - 10:59pm
Yes, I agree - there is certainly risk in pursuing. Risk of humiliation, of further rejection, of sadness or depression. But if there is also the possibility of acceptance, love, feeling good, then that balance can tip and people may keep pursuing even in the face of more pain. Such a tough position to be in.
I feel like this article
Submitted by Matt Dutcher on November 3, 2009 - 11:40pm
I feel like this article didn't really say anything at all. You ask the question, "What do we do when the person we want doesn't want us back?" I was looking for there to be an answer to this, but it was never forthcoming. I feel like the whole story could be summarized in a few sentences without all the fluff, and it still wouldn't have told me anything I didn't already know. Sorry if you take offense, but I've always found constructive criticism to be very helpful.
response
Submitted by Deana on May 31, 2018 - 11:55am
yes what do we do when someone we love and desire "doesn't feel like it"? All I think is what have I done or have become that I am not desirable anymore. But this article doesn't answer the direct question it begins with. Please help with answers and not fluff.
thanks
Submitted by Debby Herbenick Ph.D., M.P.H. on November 4, 2009 - 8:16am
Yes, thanks for the constructive feedback. Given the space limitations of blogging, I'm planning to create two additional posts with concrete tips on (a) how to move on and (b) how to re-connect/enhance desire between two people. In the mean time, resources are listed at the bottom of the page for readers who may be seeking out information regarding either of these paths. Thank you for taking the time to write. Debby
I feel a little better now...
Submitted by David Kaplan on November 4, 2009 - 11:32am
This is somewhat related to your post. Although, the relationship was not a sexual one.
I've always had a difficult time "rejecting" someone. Both for altrustic reasons (ie. I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings) and for self-centered reasons (ie. I don't want someone to hate me.)
Today, I checked my email and I got a message from someone who found me on Facebook (thanks FB.) We were close friends as teenagers, but as I got a little older I felt the relationship was unhealthy. I look back and I think to myself that, although the person turned into a jerk, I was also unable to cope with it in a healthy way. So we were probably both to blame.
My decision was to end the friendship. It was very difficult at the time.
Today I felt conflicted as to whether or not I should allow this person back into myself - knowing, again, that I'll hold some responsibility for the friendship - should we reconnect.
Well, I decided to delete the message and to refrain from contact with them. I know, from my history and personality, that I would probably still be unable to cope with the person. I also doubt the person has changed very much. In either case, today I have some very healthy and happy relationships with new friends (and old ones!) and I really don't need this person in my life.
I'm glad that you mentioned the "what's right for them now" thing. I believe that what's right for me now is not to engage with this person. And, your post sorta validated my feelings.
Thanks!
David Kaplan
I think you might have
Submitted by Cuki on March 30, 2014 - 6:56pm
I think you might have misread that paragraph. There's nothing kind and compassionate in doing what feels right for yourself, it's just selfish. I'm not saying that there's something inherently wrong with being selfish (even if I think there is), but you owe it to yourself to at least acknowledge it. And then ask for validation.
oh me...
Submitted by Anonymous on November 9, 2009 - 9:20pm
I'm finding myself in this situation. Originally it seemed like we felt the same way towards each other, then suddenly I found myself being the only one putting any effort into forming a relationship. That was very hard, and not fun at all. Wanting nothing more than to just spend time with someone who apparently doesn't share the same desire is very difficult to deal with.
It came to the point where I was forced to give up. It seemed like that is what she wanted me to do, and I didn't want to make it an uncomfortable situation with me relentlessly chasing someone who had no interest in me (ie stalker). Then it turned out maybe they weren't trying to avoid me as much as I had thought, as they actually came to see me without my request...
The entire situation is still confusing, but I have realized that I know what I want and am willing to risk rejection and humiliation in an attempt to get it. I don't know what else to do, lol. In the end I find it to be worth the risk...
so sad this is true
Submitted by silent on September 28, 2015 - 2:44pm
Anonymous wrote:I'm finding myself in this situation. Originally it seemed like we felt the same way towards each other, then suddenly I found myself being the only one putting any effort into forming a relationship. That was very hard, and not fun at all. Wanting nothing more than to just spend time with someone who apparently doesn't share the same desire is very difficult to deal with.
It came to the point where I was forced to give up. It seemed like that is what she wanted me to do, and I didn't want to make it an uncomfortable situation with me relentlessly chasing someone who had no interest in me (ie stalker). Then it turned out maybe they weren't trying to avoid me as much as I had thought, as they actually came to see me without my request...
The entire situation is still confusing, but I have realized that I know what I want and am willing to risk rejection and humiliation in an attempt to get it. I don't know what else to do, lol. In the end I find it to be worth the risk...
yes me too.. in fact running through.. and hopeing this will get better.. but only getting worse
mutuality and friendship
Submitted by Anonymous on January 4, 2010 - 5:11am
Mine isn't a story of unrequited desire -it's about unrequited friendship. I used to be friendly with someone with whom I don't have much in common intellectually but found pleasant to be with. I helped her out a lot in certain tough circumstances she had. Well, a few years back, I had a lot of health problems (with my heart so quite serious) and she couldn't even be bothered to visit me or meet up with me although, compared to other friends, she was quite free to do so.
I don't have a great feeling of animosity towards her but I do not value her friendship now that she revealed this basic selfishness. She clearly wants me to be a lifelong friend whereas I regard here now as mere acquaintance.
It is a difficult one - I'm not sure how she would respond to being told what I felt about her behaviour and I'm inclined just to let the situation drift.
Sometimes I wonder why people take it so personally when others don't desire them - it's usually the surface of the body they don't desire, not the person. Sexuality can be pretty shallow. One guy I really respected and fancied once rejected me because he clearly thought I was too moody. Funnily enough, i didn't mind this because it meant he'd actually paid some attention to my personality .
If someone doesn't find you sexually attractive, then they don't. Pursuing it just causes misery. If there are emotional problems, it is easier to resolve. I am currently slightly obsessed with someone I know it would be a bad idea to have a relationship with, even if they wanted to (mixed messages). The motivation for the obsession is that this is a fantasy I can't have.
Mutuality is the keystone of a good relationship. No-one feels exactly the same level of liking/attraction towards the other all the time - it ocmes and goes. But relationships where one person isn't valued are pretty grim.
agonising doesnt adequately describe the pain
Submitted by Helen on January 20, 2010 - 1:23pm
Before christmas 2009 I revealed my feelings to a guy who over the previous 6 months had become a good friend. We shared many confidences. Its now jan 20th He had changed his mobie number, deleted his hotmail account and is Not answering his work email. I always knew the best way to ruin a great friendship is a relationship but I am shocked by the speed with which he backed off. Mobile deleted by jan 6th. No warning at all. The bottom has dropped out of my world. More painful than that is the fact that I miss my friend so very much and can't understand just what I did that was so terrible.
If anyone out there has any idea how I deal with this, I would be glad to hear because the pain that I have been in over the last 2 weeks is tearing me up.
Unrequited love
Submitted by Anonymous on October 6, 2010 - 3:26pm
I totally understand about unrequited love!
I find myself falling for 'unavailable men' over and over again. I know most people will say I have anything from bad choices to unresolved issues to fear of intimacy etc etc.
Recently I fell hard for a man I work with, he's lovely, kind and a bit of a flirt but in a gentle way. He gave me confidence to talk about many things and I gave me hugs too.
It took me a long time to realise that my affections weren't returned and it still hurts. The only way forward is to be aware that you cannot make someone care about you, no matter how much you try to adapt yourself and your behaviour.
I'm still feeling like Alice in Bewilderland, and as a result have shutdown the openness we shared and withdrawn, feeling very stupid and cursing myself for lost opportunities that seemed to arise between us.
I see this man most days, and the pain and discomfort I feel are very real. It will pass, my logical mind knows this. My heart is taking a lot of convincing!
It hurts, but as with all
Submitted by Anonymous on August 11, 2011 - 10:17pm
It hurts, but as with all things, time heals. Once I accepted that I didnt do anything wrong by expressing my feelings, I felt a lot better. I cant control how others react to certain things and nothing ventured, nothing gained!!!!!
still friendly
Submitted by Anonymous on August 31, 2011 - 7:37pm
I have this co-worker with whom I became friendlier than most other men. I felt comfortable talking to him and we have great conversations. I am a married woman and he knew all along. He revealed to me his feelings and yet we are still able to continue talking. We both know that there will never be anything romantic between us and he is ok with that. I am glad he told me, because now we know to be more careful, but yet we can still enjoy the occasional conversations we have. I guess it depends on how both parties can handle such a situation. We joke about it and it makes it much easier.
I wish that was how my
Submitted by Anonymous on August 31, 2011 - 11:02pm
I wish that was how my situation played out. My married friend opted to stop talking to me. I should have kept quiet......no one ive known before or since has made me as happy as this woman did. "And so it goes"......
Lost Love
Submitted by Anonymous on October 20, 2011 - 2:19pm
I will try to make this short. I lived with my lover for 21 years. He was my everything, raised my son, did everything for me. I could always rely on him. I left him because he was a heavy smoker (weed) and afterwards would just fall asleep. In the beginning it was okay because we still had sexual contact. After a few years the sex was almost non-existent. Work, Eat, Smoke, Sleep and begin all over again. I left twice thinking this would change things and came back. The third time he refused to let me return. I love this man today as I did 21 years ago. He has since become cruel, blocked me from his FB, and will only pick up my phone calls if he feels like it. We share a granddaughter who is the light of his life (consequently became part of the problem as he doted on her). Today although he is not the blood grandfather, he is the only grandfather she knows and I will not take that from her. But, not having a good relationship with my granddaughter's mother, he sees her more than I do (sometimes my son will bring her over). It's been almost 5 years and I am still suffering (badly). I have no life and I just want him back. Someone tell me, is it completely over, is there nothing I can do to win him back. He has not had any other woman since we broke up (yes, I know him and consequently I know this); and I have not had another man (so I might as well have stayed (lol). What can I do, I am in agony yet I don't want to continue to be a complete jerk.
What he needed vs. what you wanted...
Submitted by Guy0001 on June 15, 2015 - 5:41am
I suppose all he ever wanted was your acceptance, not be asked to change. You left: what did you think would happen? You may continue to be friends, but as the saying goes "You've made your bed, now lay in it".
Friends
Submitted by Anonymous on January 30, 2012 - 10:34pm
I am a lesbian and work with a woman whom I'm developing a friendship with. I'm finding myself very attracted to her, and am enjoying her company. My feelings for her are becoming stronger the more time we spend together. Although she has indicated that she is straight, she tends to send "mixed messages." I'm left feeling torn and confused. I often feel like I'm on a roller coaster of emotions; excited and happy when I'm with her, yet left wanting more. For now, though, I guess, patience is the word of the day. I know that, at some point, this "unrequited love" may get too painful and confusing to continue, yet for now, I'm happy and content to continue the friendship.
Friends
Submitted by Anonymous on January 30, 2012 - 10:40pm
I am a lesbian and work with a woman whom I'm developing a friendship with. I'm finding myself very attracted to her, and am enjoying her company. My feelings for her are becoming stronger the more time we spend together. Although she has indicated that she is straight, she tends to send "mixed messages." I'm left feeling torn and confused. I often feel like I'm on a roller coaster of emotions; excited and happy when I'm with her, yet left wanting more. For now, though, I guess, patience is the word of the day. I know that, at some point, this "unrequited love" may get too painful and confusing to continue, yet for now, I'm happy and content to continue the friendship.
I was stuck in sort of a
Submitted by Cil on May 23, 2012 - 4:04am
I was stuck in sort of a Groundhog Day only with Unrequited Love over and over and over. It seems I am as interesting as a white sheet of paper. I've never had a boyfriend or all. Worst... when I liked a guy, he tended to found a girlfriend (if he didn't have one) or get married! Talk about bad luck.
Years ago I just stopped myself of falling for anyone so that I could prevent rejection from ever happening again. It was not easy, but with a good discipline I just learned to avoid it all. The first thing was to find something in myself that I could use as a "no no" reason. I am ugly as I was told by some of the guys I liked. So, that is the first thing I remember myself. If my interest is still kept lingering somewhere, I remember myself that I gained a great amount of weight, that is, I am fat. So, I just tell myself if men never paid attention to me when I was something akin to size zero in USA, the guy would never look at me when I am fat. That solved my problem.
Cruel? Yep. But in my case, it is way better if I say these things to myself than being rejected because of them. I once heard that a man wouldn't date me because I was a virgin. I've never felt so bad in my life.
Allure is a state of mind
Submitted by Sunshine25 on November 19, 2018 - 6:56pm
Hi Cil,
Please don't do this to yourself. Usually, how we feel about ourselves on the inside, is what gets reflected to the outside, and that's what compels people to perceive us as either ugly or beautiful. When we buy a new, gorgeous outfit and have a professional do our hair and makeup, and we are eating healthy and exercising, we are feeling good about ourselves and so we walk with our head up, shoulders back, and a little spring in our step- we "become" more attractive just by how we feel about ourselves. Sometimes we receive overly critical messages when we're kids, and those messages get stuck in our heads and we go about feeling inferior as adults. You may want to try counseling and various other healing techniques to help turn those negative self-perceptions into feeling good about yourself. Be well and feel good!!
Unrequited Life
Submitted by Anonymous on October 14, 2012 - 9:53am
I am an unhappy 45 yr old man. Seems to me that love is a very dangerous emotion, made that way because of the way we have constructed our society. Real love, to me, is universal and unbounded and cannot be exclusive to just one person. Sex is just one tiny part of the expression of love and there should be no reason why men & women can't be good friends even if 'with' someone. I always seem to find a total mismatch between those I fall for and those that fall for me. Result is pain all the way. And often it is because of the fact they are with someone. Wouldn't give tuppence for love but then never had it returned (except when it's thrown back in my face). I want to know how to turn this emotion off as it's the only way I can see of getting through life. Christmas and special occasions I find are particularly hard as you never get to spend the special times with those you really care about.
To turn the emotion of love
Submitted by Anonymous on January 28, 2013 - 6:11am
To turn the emotion of love off, what I do is when ever I see a woman whom I might be attracted to, I think about (or imagine) aspects of her that might be unattractive or undesirable. That is, consciously replace thoughts of attraction with thoughts of repulsion. After a while, the desire slowly disappears. Its sort of like Cognitive Behavioral Therapy but applied to feelings of desire. The other obvious aspect is to minimize and, if possible, stop all contact with any women for whom you might develop feelings.
In my case, I'm left with deep unrelenting loneliness but that's been a feature of my entire life. The only way around the loneliness is to keep yourself occupied all the time. I've found that an idle mind that is devoid of love will always return to depressing thoughts if left unchecked.
wat am i doing..
Submitted by rajeev reddy on October 21, 2012 - 12:39am
i met this girl n i felt like i should always stay nxt to her, helping her .. i want her to use me !! and i knw thrz nothing related to lust in this cause shes totally diff from every one in my fantasies . SHE SAID tht i could be her friend but i wanna do more than tht .. n she softly said "thts not possible (social differences btw th families)" . but y am i still going after her ....wat am i into ??
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I got my ex husband back
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Unrequited Love
Submitted by Mark W. on July 24, 2015 - 1:45am
I am bisexual and married with 3 kids. When I was 23 I seduced my best friend (male) of 4 years from college ( it was not very difficult. too much wine, the right porn movie then a penis measuring contest. Next thing we were in bed) although he had no gay experience. We were both dating what, in a matter of months would become our wives.
Bill I will call him and I are fantastic lovers and I love him more than I have loved anyone.Bill goes through these guilt phases where he does not want to be intimate, thinks I made him gay and wishes he never met me. The longest was 3 years and my heart ached every day. Just when I thought I was over him, he calls on my birthday. I went and visited him the next day and within 30 minutes we were making love in his martial bed.
Then three years later he pulls the same thing/\. I know these are real or I would punch him out. Well, this one was in March and I made a note and also sent him an email "will not make love to you unless you have a note signed by two psychologists". In January Bill said he was coming to town and did I want to go out to eat. I wrote a note and put in my pocket "if Bill still feel same way in one week make love to him". We seeing him there with his puppy dog eyes I just melted and that was it, but I did say "are you alright with this" Yes, he said. We made love six times that night. T^he next morning I asked him "Do you still feel OK about what we have done" Yes he said. I even sent an email that said "If you think you made the wrong decision that is OK.
Here is the shock. We have now been lovers 30 years. All our kids are grown. His wife is a bitch that hates me and treats him bad. I love my wife and she love Bill. Bill and I have probably made love 500-700 times. If he died it would kill me.
We are in one of those "I made him gay phases, " I was just forced into early retirement by a corporate takeover and have been very depressed (but the money is great). Bill has done nothing to help me even though he knows I would do anything for him. In the dark of the night, when it is just he and I, I will hear him whisper "I love you". We are such compatible lovers that we reach orgasm at the same time.
I would tell my wife right now and I think she would probably stay because she loves me and she either likes or love Bill and she wants me to be happy. But Bill's parents are still alive and his witch wife would go right to them and say "do you know you raised a queer?"
Now that Bill and I are now both 55, I really can't take another broker heart. It isn't even about sex anymore, I just love him.
I now I am stupid to take this and one tome I didn't. I videotaped us making love and when he pulled the "I am not gay" I said "well you sure look gay in this video, so shut up and stop causing trouble. I would have never done anything with the tape but it got him in line real quick, plus it is a beautiful tape.
So there is my Unrequited Love of 30 years, because it may be, he may just like the sex and I am the romantic.
Speechless
Submitted by A.D'Lane on September 8, 2015 - 1:10am
Your story could be a screenplay for a movie. In fact it sounds like Brokeback Mountain, which is a film I love. What an amazing experience, love, passion, lost romance, etc. I hope you find true love and can be happy.
your comment in Psychology Today
Submitted by Mark W. on November 25, 2016 - 12:57am
I am sorry that your comment was grabbed by my spam filter.
Unfortunately Bill and I are in about the same situation. The crazy thing is that I am not interest in finding a male to have sex with or as a lover. Bill was my friend, my buddy, my confidant first. I was also his. I didn't think about going to bed with him until 3 or 4 years after we were friends.
The other thing is and he knows some but not all is I have been more successful in life and I have pulled stings to help him, some at his request some he never has found out about. I am glad I was able to do it.
He has now moved further away, given up his career (I had to warn him he was working for crooks and he got out just in time) and works at an upscale men's clothes store. If you looked at the store you would say that it caters to rich gay men. He has even been featured modeling clothes and some of them make him look extremely gay. A cynic would say "he has a new BF" I hope he does because he has absolutely no friends. None. He won't let anyone close to him. His wife, who is on the road M-F makes the money, keeps him isolated from his only family, his parents (his parents call me their second son).
I send him an e-mail as I would normally every 2-3 weeks and maybe he will answer every 5th one with one sentence. Actually, he did weird stuff like that when we were best friends but I would call him and say "stop being a weirdo and write an email of more than one sentence."
But life goes on. i doubt I will ever give up on him as that's just me. But he has to be leading a sad life.
If you know a movie producer send him this way!
Mark
Hello everybody, i want to
Submitted by Lucas Ashley on January 19, 2016 - 5:26am
Hello everybody, i want to thank DR INEGBEDION for saving my marriage, I have been married for 3 years now and another woman had a spell to take my husband away from me and my kids, ever since then, i have been suffering with my kids until I saw a comment on how DR INEGBEDION have
helped someone to get back her husband too and I decided to give him a try through his email via: drinegbedionspellhome@gmail.com to help me bring my Husband back home and believe me, I just send my picture to
him and that of my husband and after 48 hours as he told me, my husband drove home by himself apologizing that I should forgive him, now my husband has show me much love more than ever. I am so happy to be with my husband and kids again, I’m sharing my experience because i know a lot of people need this help too. if you are one of those people and
you want to get your lover back contact DR INEGBEDION via email: drinegbedionspellhome@gmail.com and he will surely help you just the way he has helped me. Once again, thanks to DR INEGBEDION
Best Regard
Lucas Ashley
Dr.Candova brought my Ex back to me
Submitted by Pamela Scott on February 8, 2016 - 9:22am
I'm Pamela Scott from Las Vegas,USA.I can’t hide this amazing testimony that took place in my life. A powerful spell-caster named Dr. Candova brought back my love who left me and run off with another woman while I was six months pregnant,it was a painful period for me because i loved him so much an didn't want to lose him,so i contact Dr.Candova via email: CANDOVALOVESPELL@GMAIL.COM and whatsapp him with his number +2348131612153,he cast a spell for me and behold my husband was back to me and we are now a happy family,contact him to fix your relationship because he did it for me and i completely trust Dr.Candova to fix your relationship,Thank you Dr.Candova for this.
I'm Pamela Scott from Las
Submitted by Pamela Scott on February 9, 2016 - 11:13am
I'm Pamela Scott from Las Vegas,USA.I can’t hide this amazing testimony that took place in my life. A powerful spell-caster named Dr. Candova brought back my love who left me and run off with another woman while I was six months pregnant,it was a painful period for me because i loved him so much an didn't want to lose him,so i contact Dr.Candova via email: CANDOVALOVESPELL@GMAIL.COM and whatsapp him with his number +2348131612153,he cast a spell for me and behold my husband was back to me and we are now a happy family,contact him to fix your relationship because he did it for me and i completely trust Dr.Candova to fix your relationship,Thank you Dr.Candova for this.
People
Submitted by Atty on September 21, 2016 - 1:51pm
Your article has some very valid points. The comments and stories shared are very touching. I sincerely mean that. What I think we all fail to realize is .. people can be dbags.. that's just who they are. We look so deep within ourselves ..throwing ourselves out there.. getting "ran over" by they're blatant, although somewhat charismatic, selfishness. I mean.. we're obviously attracted to them .. we end up walking five hundred brain storms as to why they're not as into us as we are them.. the stress of it all .. overwhelming. I've known some girls who don't eat.. can't sleep.. they're completely oblivious to the fact that they're putting their lives ..and loved ones.. on hold trying to chase some dbag. (Guys you're just as bad ..so stop laughing at my girl comment ;)).. my point is.. don't lose yourself or try to fit the mold of whatever you think will make that person want you.. some people are just natural born aholes and nothing you do or say is going to change that. Be thankful you dodged it in the long run.
May be because of age and
Submitted by say so on October 14, 2017 - 8:33am
May be because of age and experience I have learned to accept refusals and rejections. in many cases there are good reasons. For my cases I found out a rejecting woman could be hiv positive and does not want you involved in frustrations. the woman may also be emotionally or sexually damaged. I have learned not to even ask for the reasons. apparently there are too many issues and problems in the world.
even not being attracted to me is a good enough reason.
why would I want a woman to telorate me when there exists women that can give thanks to their gods daily that I am a part of their lives?
most compassionate response
Submitted by say so on May 25, 2018 - 5:50am
most compassionate response is to acknowledge that whatever the other person chose is perhaps best for them at the moment. .....
and sometimes best for you too. they may be gay, have secret addictions, be terminally ill, have psychological disordera etc and they do not want to drag you into their world. So always have a measure of gladness when a relationship won't move forward.
THIS IS WHAT YOU NEED IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP
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In our simple life, love plays a very specific role. Now we are able to make your love life healthy and no space for any type of trouble. These all are possible with the help of EKPEN TEMPLE OF SOLUTION. He helped me cast a spell that brought my long lost lover back within 48hours who left me for another woman. You can also contact him on EKPENTEMPLE @ GMAIL. COM and be happy forever like am now with his experience.
What a miracle by Dr Zakuza
Submitted by Jackson Princkney on August 29, 2018 - 10:42am
My purpose out here today is to share this article to the world about how Dr Zakuza from India. Dr Zakuza helped me in getting back my EX-girlfriend that broke up with me 4 months ago. My name is Jackson Pinckney from Cape Town South Africa. I tried all i could to make her see reasons with me that we can continue our relationship but she neglected and turn down my decision. Thank God for giving me the thought of going into the internet for help, i searched properly and i saw different reviews of Dr Zakuza and i insisted in giving it a try by contacting him via what's app on +1 (845) 400–7115. He gave me reason to live again and he prepared a spell and told me that my Ex-girlfriend will come back to me within 12 to 16 hours. Can you believe it, my EX-girlfriend came back to me and our wedding will hold before the end of this year. Contact him now!!! if you need any help. Email: doctorzakuzaspelltemple @ yahoo. com
What a miracle by Dr. Zakuza
Submitted by Jackson Pinckney on September 4, 2018 - 4:23pm
My purpose out here today is to share this article to the world about how Dr Zakuza from India. Dr Zakuza helped me in getting back my EX-girlfriend that broke up with me 4 months ago. My name is Jackson Pinckney from Cape Town South Africa. I tried all i could to make her see reasons with me that we can continue our relationship but she neglected and turn down my decision. Thank God for giving me the thought of going into the internet for help, i searched properly and i saw different reviews of Dr Zakuza and i insisted in giving it a try by contacting him via what's app on +1 (845) 400–7115. He gave me reason to live again and he prepared a spell and told me that my Ex-girlfriend will come back to me within 12 to 16 hours. Can you believe it, my EX-girlfriend came back to me and our wedding will hold before the end of this year. Contact him now!!! if you need any help. Email: doctorzakuzaspelltemple @ yahoo. com
BEST ONLINE SPELL CASTER
Submitted by briana sherry on September 6, 2018 - 6:02pm
Contact Dr Gbojie at gbojiespiritualtemple @ gmail. com if you want to get your Husband, Wife, Boyfriend and Girlfriend back now and regain your happiness.
Hi i am from USA I have just experience the wonders of Dr. gbojie love spell, that have been spread on the internet and worldwide, How he marvelously helped people all over the world to restored back their marriage life and get back lost lovers, and also help to win lottery. I contacted him after going through so many testimonies from different people how he help to bring back ex lover back, i told him about my husband that abandoned me about 8 months ago, and left home with all i had.. dr Gbojie only told me to smile and have a rest of mind he will handle all in just 24 hours, After the second day my husband called me, i was just so shocked, i pick the call and couldn't believe my ears, he was really begging me to forgive him and making promises on phone.. He came back home and also got me a new car just for him to proof his love for me. i was so happy and called Dr gbojie and thanked him, he only told me to share the good news all over the world .. Well if you need an effective and real spell caster contact Dr gbojie Via email: gbojiespiritualtemple @ gmail. com or Call or WhatsApp: +2349066410185 a
What a miracle by Dr Zakuza
Submitted by Jackson Pinckney on September 6, 2018 - 6:07pm
My purpose out here today is to share this article to the world about how Dr Zakuza from India. Dr Zakuza helped me in getting back my EX-girlfriend that broke up with me 4 months ago. My name is Jackson Pinckney from Cape Town South Africa. I tried all i could to make her see reasons with me that we can continue our relationship but she neglected and turn down my decision. Thank God for giving me the thought of going into the internet for help, i searched properly and i saw different reviews of Dr Zakuza and i insisted in giving it a try by contacting him via what's app on +1 (845) 400–7115. He gave me reason to live again and he prepared a spell and told me that my Ex-girlfriend will come back to me within 12 to 16 hours. Can you believe it, my EX-girlfriend came back to me and our wedding will hold before the end of this year. Contact him now!!! if you need any help. Email: doctorzakuzaspelltemple @ yahoo. com
Hello
Submitted by Marian Micheal on September 29, 2018 - 11:49am
I am from UNITED STATES i was heart broken when my husband dumped me for another girl, i was really in love with him without him i was empty until i contacted Dr Lawrence for a love binding spell, he cast a spell for me to got my husband back and my husband came back after 2days when he cast the spell i will advise any one in any kind of problem to contact Lawrence for any kind of spell on his email: drlawrencespelltemple @ hotmail. com
RESTORING YOUR PARTNER AND GROWING YOUR FINANCES
Submitted by Michael Louis on December 4, 2018 - 6:51am
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LOVE LOVE
Submitted by Anonymous on February 7, 2019 - 8:50pm
I want to say that i love my man. and it makes me anxious that i cannot show him this love. i am calling him again tomorrow. he needs to know that i love him.. he's going through weired stuff right now, but i feel i got something to do with it, at least its not completly with me out of the picture.. i play some role.. and even though i try to run.. find another man.. HE is right.. he still is right.. i cant help it.. my heart tells me.. every SINGLE time i go back to him.. i learn more.. love more.. more deeply.. my depression and also not wanting to live gets worse but i CANT HELP LOVING HIM AGAIN AFTER MY HEART HAS HEALED and thats ok. i might sound crazy and maybe i am, but this just needed to come out..
LOVE SPELLS THAT WORKS
Submitted by Cindy on May 6, 2019 - 11:01pm
My husband and I have been married for over 10 years. We met when I was 18 and he was 21. We’ve been through a lot emotionally together. There were several HUGE fights and painful situations in our marriage, but we always seemed to come out stronger on the other side. Out of the blue my husband just sprung the divorce talk on me, I was totally depressed until I found Dr.Todd website online and i ordered for a Love spell. You won’t believe my husband called me at the exact time this spell caster finished his spell work in 24hours. I was totally amazed! He is wonderful and his spells work so fast. His contact: manifestspellcast @ gmail. com
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