The Novel Perspective

Life as a work in progress

Kim Schneiderman L.C.S.W., M.S.W

Would You Rather Be Right Than Loved?

Would you rather be right than loved? The price of always needing to be right is emotional distance.

Believe It or Not, Your Anxiety Loves You

Election jitters? Never fear. Believe it or not, your anxiety loves you.

How to Actively Listen During Triggering Conversations

How to actively listen when you want to plug your ears.

Searching for Hope on the Dark Side

Lessons from the dark side about surviving and thriving during COVID-19.

Welcome to Spiritual Boot Camp

Quarantine as spiritual boot camp: how sheltering in place builds inner strength when there's no place to run.

Sitting on My Couch, I Find My Ruby Slippers

Every seven years, a crisis blows into my life. I never imagined that my next twister would be a global pandemic.

Projection as Protection

Are you projecting or self-protecting? How to sort fact from fiction to avoid the blame and shame game.

"It's Your Fault, Not Mine!"

It feels good to be right. But blame and shame have the potential to wreak havoc on our relationships.

Embrace Your Introversion

Are you an introvert who wishes they were an extravert? Stop comparing and embrace your strengths.

How to Reframe Your Narrative About Difficult Relationships

Is someone mistreating you or pushing your buttons? Imagine your nemesis as the personal trainer of an emotional and mental muscle workout

How to Write a New Chapter in the New Year

Two exercises to reframe and transform your life story.

'Tis the Season for Family Drama

7 tips to keep the family grinch from stealing your holiday cheer.

How Are You Growing?

There are no trophies for personal growth. But we can value internal victories by changing our catch-up conversations.

To Stay or Not to Stay in Managed Care

If you can't find a therapist who takes your insurance, here's why...

From Mindless Din to Deep Mindfulness

How spiritually oriented therapy heals mind, body, and spirit.

Stop Making Resolutions that Leave You Disappointed

Tired of beating yourself up for falling short of your goals? In 2108, make a resolution to be firm but loving parent to yourself.

Triumph or Tragedy: How You Tell Your Story Matters

While making mistakes is not an especially pleasurable experience, when people become depressed, it is usually because they mistake difficult chapters for the entire plotline. They also under-value the important lessons that come from harder chapters which, if we read them correctly, can help us move on to happier ones.

Your Anger Knows Your Worth

Your anger knows your worth: 10 steps to turn your temper into a teacher.

The Self, Lost and Found

How creativity holds up a mirror to your inner world.

It's Not Whether You Win or Lose But How You Tell Your Story

Although we can't always control the plotline of our lives, happy endings are often a matter of choice.

And the Oscar Goes To...

Pixar's "Inside Out" deserves an award for being the best teaching tool about human emotions ever.

Conflict, the Ultimate Character Development Workout

The antagonists of our life stories are like the personal trainers who push us beyond our perceived limitations to develop our flabby, underutilized emotional muscles and strengthen our character.

Fooling Your Ego

A growing body of research that shows that viewing your life from a psychologically distant vantage point can help you see yourself through kinder, more compassionate eyes.

Tapping Into Your Omniscient Narrator

Writing about yourself in the third person narrative is a remedy for tunnel vision, offering an elevated, compassionate perspective on your life.

Compare and Despair

Comparing yourself to others is always a waste of energy because everyone's history and life path is different. It's far better to compare yourself to yourself and see how you've grown.

The Trouble with Texting

If 93 percent of communication is visual and auditory, texting may actually create more problems than it solves.

Creativity Is Our Birthright

Broadly defined, creativity is bringing something new into existence. As human beings, it’s practically our birthright. Every day, we wake up to a blank canvas with a wide range of colors, textures, and shapes at our disposal. From choosing what clothes to wear to preparing breakfast, each tiny decision sculpts our experience of the world.

Magical Thinking, Delusions, or Synchronicity?

Human beings are natural storytellers and meaning makers. We have lucky numbers and charmed rabbit’s feet. Our problems may not lie so much in our beliefs that don’t stand up to scientific reasoning, but in our attachments to narratives that don’t serve us or cause us harm.

Love and Redemption in the Face of Loss

For years, I had been helping people reclaim the authorship rights of their life stories. But after a series of family deaths, my ideas were put to the test. Could I turn a family tragedy into a story of love and redemption?

The Truth About Transitions

As we age, we are often measured by our gains, not our losses, our stability, not our vulnerability. That's why so many people are devastated when the temple of their familiar world is shaken. Yet change doesn't have to be scary. Understanding the three stages of transition can help us navigate life's twists and turns.

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