The Forgiving Life

Forgiveness

How to Stop Blaming Yourself When Your Partner Is Abusive

Robert Enright Ph.D. on May 6, 2026

When hurt by others, we can develop a new hurt in response to those original wounds: condemning ourselves. It is time to stand against these self-condemnations and conquer them.

When hurt by others, we can develop a new hurt in response to those original wounds: condemning ourselves. It is time to stand against these self-condemnations and conquer them.

Forgiveness

The Emotions Behind Forgiveness

Robert Enright Ph.D. on April 22, 2026

Research shows that as people forgive, they begin to develop softer emotions toward the offending person. Here's how that process happens.

Research shows that as people forgive, they begin to develop softer emotions toward the offending person. Here's how that process happens.

Forgiveness

Do You Really Think You Know What Forgiveness Is?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on March 24, 2026

Without a clear understanding of forgiveness, people may start on a journey they call "forgiveness," but end up not dealing with it at all. First understand, then practice it.

Without a clear understanding of forgiveness, people may start on a journey they call "forgiveness," but end up not dealing with it at all. First understand, then practice it.

Forgiveness

Protecting Yourself if You Want to Forgive

Robert Enright Ph.D. on February 19, 2026

When a person is hurt by others, forgiveness can seem scary. These seven ideas can help you move forward with confidence.

When a person is hurt by others, forgiveness can seem scary. These seven ideas can help you move forward with confidence.

Forgiveness

Once Broken, How Can Trust Be Restored in a Relationship?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on January 19, 2026

Trust broken does not mean trust abandoned. Couples can watch for signals of change in the other person and take five steps toward a reunion that is consistent and respectful.

Trust broken does not mean trust abandoned. Couples can watch for signals of change in the other person and take five steps toward a reunion that is consistent and respectful.

Forgiveness

Why Is It So Hard to Forgive a Person Who Does Not Apologize?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on December 16, 2025

Without the other's apology, forgiveness can become more difficult. Yet difficulty does not mean impossibility.

Without the other's apology, forgiveness can become more difficult. Yet difficulty does not mean impossibility.

Forgiveness

Are You Ready to Become Forgivingly Fit?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on November 15, 2025

Is it easy to become physically fit? No, because it takes sustained effort and a valid approach. It is similar when the goal is forgiveness fitness.

Is it easy to become physically fit? No, because it takes sustained effort and a valid approach. It is similar when the goal is forgiveness fitness.

Forgiveness

The False Idea That Forgiveness Is for Me, Not the Offender

Robert Enright Ph.D. on October 8, 2025

Many people on the World Wide Web use the term, "Forgiveness is for you, not for them!" What errors might such an idea bring to those who attempt to truly forgive others?

Many people on the World Wide Web use the term, "Forgiveness is for you, not for them!" What errors might such an idea bring to those who attempt to truly forgive others?

Forgiveness

Is the One Who Hurt You Entitled to Your Forgiveness?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on September 29, 2025

Some people who treat you unjustly may feel entitled to forgiveness. This can add to your discomfort. Seven themes can help you process this entitlement.

Some people who treat you unjustly may feel entitled to forgiveness. This can add to your discomfort. Seven themes can help you process this entitlement.

Forgiveness

Is Forgiveness Always Beneficial, or Can It Be Harmful?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on September 21, 2025

Examining the claim that forgiveness has a negative side.

Examining the claim that forgiveness has a negative side.

Forgiveness

5 Ways Forgiveness Can Go Wrong

Robert Enright Ph.D. on July 22, 2025

2. “I am not mad anymore" (but you're still not be worthy).

2. “I am not mad anymore" (but you're still not be worthy).

Forgiveness

When You've Tried Without Success to Forgive Mom or Dad

Robert Enright Ph.D. on June 17, 2025

When you have tried and failed to forgive a parent, turn to these 5 approaches that may bring forgiveness—and healing—a little closer.

When you have tried and failed to forgive a parent, turn to these 5 approaches that may bring forgiveness—and healing—a little closer.

Forgiveness

Which Protects You Better: Anger or Forgiveness?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on May 14, 2025

When treated unfairly by others, we sometimes get angry and sometimes forgive. Given that both anger and forgiveness can benefit the one mistreated, which should we choose?

When treated unfairly by others, we sometimes get angry and sometimes forgive. Given that both anger and forgiveness can benefit the one mistreated, which should we choose?

Forgiveness

How to Cultivate a Partner's Respect

Robert Enright Ph.D. on April 22, 2025

Are you often the recipient of disrespect from your partner? If so, this can affect your well-being. Consider these seven steps toward cultivating respect.

Are you often the recipient of disrespect from your partner? If so, this can affect your well-being. Consider these seven steps toward cultivating respect.

Forgiveness

Why Forgiveness Therapy? Advice for Those Contemplating It

Robert Enright Ph.D. on March 18, 2025

If I pursue forgiveness therapy, what exactly is it? What are its goals? What are some drawbacks to it? Clear answers may help clients decide if it is appropriate for them.

If I pursue forgiveness therapy, what exactly is it? What are its goals? What are some drawbacks to it? Clear answers may help clients decide if it is appropriate for them.

Forgiveness

How Can Forgiving Someone Else Build My Own Self-Esteem?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on February 26, 2025

For those who criticize forgiveness, it may seem odd to know that as people forgive, their self-esteem can increase. How is this possible?

For those who criticize forgiveness, it may seem odd to know that as people forgive, their self-esteem can increase. How is this possible?

Relationships

Your Unfolding Love Story

Robert Enright Ph.D. on January 1, 2025

Although rare as a psychological research topic, the concept of agape love may be vital to who we are as persons. Here are five approaches for growing in agape love.

Although rare as a psychological research topic, the concept of agape love may be vital to who we are as persons. Here are five approaches for growing in agape love.

Forgiveness

Reaching the Highest Level of Forgiveness in Relationships

Robert Enright Ph.D. on December 10, 2024

When forgiveness is defined as reducing anger, it does not go deeply enough. Expanding the definition of forgiveness to include a certain kind of love may enhance relationships.

When forgiveness is defined as reducing anger, it does not go deeply enough. Expanding the definition of forgiveness to include a certain kind of love may enhance relationships.

Forgiveness

Making Forgiveness a Part of the Marriage Preparation

Robert Enright Ph.D. on November 19, 2024

Marriage preparation instruction often omits learning about forgiveness. Forgiving family-of-origin members and then each other can reduce resentment and help a marriage to thrive.

Marriage preparation instruction often omits learning about forgiveness. Forgiving family-of-origin members and then each other can reduce resentment and help a marriage to thrive.

Forgiveness

Can We Forgive if Disrespected by Strangers on Social Media?

Robert Enright Ph.D. on October 28, 2024

Research worldwide shows that cyberbullying can induce negative effects. Forgiveness can cure resentment and other effects, but how can one forgive when the offender is anonymous?

Research worldwide shows that cyberbullying can induce negative effects. Forgiveness can cure resentment and other effects, but how can one forgive when the offender is anonymous?