How to Validate Your Black Woman Client’s Experience

The 2021 article, “African Americans and The Reluctance To Seek Treatment,” written by Dr. Patricia Bethea Whitfield, notes that many Black people do not seek mental health therapy due to a historically rooted concern and present-day reinforced fact that they will experience discrimination and biases while in treatment. These biases can be demonstrated by improper diagnosis (the wrong diagnosis), shallow treatment plans, lack of care in the planning for their sessions, the lack of preparation through research of the intersections between their Black cultural identity and their mental health diagnosis, and by invalidating their experiences.

Generally, we know and understand the first four barriers. It’s obvious, and there are many research articles, public scholarship pieces, op-eds, and media coverage on the topics. However, the last point, invalidating the lived experiences of Black people, is not explored as often because it puts the therapist in a hot seat… in a different hot seat.

This hot seat is specific to countertransference. It is countertransference.

In the mental health industry, we sometimes treat countertransference like it’s a curse word. A personal attack on someone’s being. An intentional act of aggression. The ultimate mental health offense.

But, for my students at Trinity Washington University, I introduce and engage them in the conversation about countertransference as a learning lesson. We must learn the key factors so we can carry out the formula and get to the true answer. Just like arithmetic, we need to learn the numbers (2, 4, 6 or biases, core beliefs, or imbedded discriminatory language), then we need to know the function (addition, subtraction, multiplication or adding to the clients experience, taking away from the clients experience, or being unhelpfully neutral) and then we need to know the other set of numbers (1, 3, 5 or purpose of the therapy – fully for the client or also satisfying for self). From the equation, we will get the answer: Countertransference.

But, like with any equation, we can change the numbers and the function to get a different outcome.

For the context of this post, the goal is to change the outcome of countertransference based on the (usually) unintentional act of bias.

But, before we go there, let’s talk about why we have biases. Well, biases tend to be core beliefs that are set in our childhood, based on experiences that we learned through observation or conversations. These beliefs are not always true. In fact, many of them are actually false. However, we do not know and recognize these beliefs as false because we have not challenged them. Even in our multicultural courses, we barely challenge our biases about clients, especially those clients who are different from us. Usually, we want to hide our biases by pretending and lying to ourselves by saying: Everyone is the same or everyone is equal. But that is not true, especially for marginalized people. Their experiences may not be like yours.

In my book, The Essential Guide for Counseling Black Women, I teach the reader how to safely address their biases so they can show up for their clients…not just their Black women clients, but all culturally diverse clients.

So, back to the topic at hand: Addressing our biases and countertransference to ensure we do not invalidate the lived experiences of Black clients.

Here are a few tips:

1. Focus on validating clients.
   1. Validation is an action! Action to prove something is correct. Your clients' experiences are correct. They lived through the experience. You do not need to verify or wonder about distortions when validating. Their lived experience is their truth.
2. Check your own biases.
   1. Your client’s truth is the truth, regardless of whether you have ever experienced it or not. And their truth is the truth, even if you wish they hadn’t had to experience it. And, most importantly, their truth is the truth, even if you do not like it or agree with it. So, check your defense because it’s more about you than it is about them.
3. Check your own discomfort when a client says something you don’t agree with, especially if it's about your race or gender.
   1. You are human. You will be uncomfortable with the things your clients say from time to time. However, you do not need to defend yourself or anyone else in sessions. The sessions are about the client and their experiences, not you and your discomfort.
   2. When you are uncomfortable about a client’s experiences, check in with your clinical supervisor and your peer supervisors. It’s ok to be uncomfortable. It is not ok to allow that to affect your sessions with your client.
4. Remember: You are not the spokesperson for your race or gender.
   1. While their statements and emotions may feel like an attack, it is not. Black women experience a lot of harm, microaggressions, and macroaggressions each day. They just need a place to share.
   2. You do not (nor should you) believe there is a need to defend your race and gender
   3. Likely, they are not projecting or experiencing transference. But your response could be countertransference. Be mindful. Be careful. Treat your client with care.
5. Remember: When they are sharing their experiences, it is not about you.
   1. Focus on allowing them to process.
   2. Listen more than you speak.
   3. State: “Tell me more”, “How do you feel?”, “Thank you for sharing.”
   4. You do not need to say more than the above, especially if you want to say more. Don’t. You will likely start to defend and justify, which would invalidate their thoughts and feelings.

Remember, countertransference is about you. But your Black woman client is entering therapy for herself. Those sessions are only and strictly about her. Treat her with care.