It’s that time of year. To paraphrase the playwright Noel Coward, the holidays are at our throats again. I was feeling stressed by too many obligatory work parties, potlucks, and family gatherings. For many of these events, I needed to bring something that showed some thought, not just pick up a package of cookies. Could mindfulness help with this aspect of holiday stress? While there are practices for mindful eating (where you eat a raisin very, very slowly and experience every nuance), these meditations weren’t helpful. I needed something more concrete and literally more hands-on. I wanted to be able to make something for holiday events that wouldn’t compromise my sanity, and yet would be simple, delicious, easy, and relatively heathy (low in sugar, fat, and gluten-free). And, it couldn’t consume too much time.
In my attempts to become a “mindful baker,” I have been adapting a recipe for a simple, easy, yet elegant walnut cake. This ethereal cake has only five ingredients. The finely ground nuts act as flour. An electric beater will save time, but a whisk works as well.
Walnut Cake
3 ½ cups walnuts (about 10 ounces)
½ cup sugar
2 teaspoons baking powder
6 large eggs, separated
½ cup black currant (or apricot) preserves
Confectioners’ sugar for dusting
Whipped cream (optional) and fresh fruit for serving.
- Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. Butter and flour a 9-inch springform pan. Pulse the walnuts, with a pinch of sugar, in a food processor until finely ground. Add the baking powder and pulse until combined.
- In a large bowl, beat the egg whites until stiff but not dry.
- In another bowl, beat the egg yolks with sugar until pale and thick. With a wooden spoon, mix in the walnuts.
- Stir one-third of the egg whites into the batter using a rubber spatula. Fold in the remaining whites in two batches.
- Place the batter in the pan and bake for 40 minutes, until golden. Transfer to a wire rack and let cool in the pan. It should unmold smoothly, but use the tip of a knife if it sticks.
- Slice the cake horizontally using a serrated knife. Set the bottom layer on a plate and spread with the preserves. Replace the top layer and dust with confectioners’ sugar. Cut into slices and serve with fresh fruit and, if you like, whipped cream.
Adapted from Sarah Copeland, Food and Wine
This ended up being an exercise in self-compassion as well. Minutes before company arrived last week, I was running late and hadn’t let the cake cool completely. I added the preserves and was replacing the top layer when it broke into three unlovely pieces. Hmmmm…what to do? I took a few deep breaths, and thought of the advice of that sage Zen Master Julia Child, who often made mistakes during the live filming of her famous TV show. “Nobody will know,” she reputedly said as she picked up a roast chicken that had dropped on the floor.
I pieced the cake together as best I could, and put the whipped cream on top, rather than on the side. It was a little lopsided, and reminded me of Charlie Brown’s forlorn Christmas tree, but my hungry guests didn’t seem to notice. It was clearly homemade and didn’t need to be perfect. They knew I cared about them, and we all enjoyed talking and being with each other. The cake was delicious, no one was judging me, and it looked, well, rustic. For moments like this the Japanese have the comforting concept of wabi sabi, the acceptance and even celebration of imperfection and asymmetry.
Happy Holidays.
Susan Pollak, MTS, Ed.D., co-author of the book Sitting Together: Essential Skills for Mindfulness-Based Psychotherapy, (Guilford Press) is a clinical instructor in psychology at Harvard Medical School
