What Is Digisexuality?

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In the modern world, humans and tech live together, and most of us now have a relationship with technology. Whether it is one of fear (the Terminator narrative), irritation (why woulnd’t my wifi work?), love (connecting with loved ones and like-minded people), entertainment (all the possibilities of games and play), or life improvement (remote working, etc.), our lives are intertwined with technology, and therefore we have a relationship and attachment with it. It is not new: Humans have always attached to objects like the comfort blanket, and now there is no denying that we are attached to our smartphones. We always know where it is, we take care of it, and we get upset if we lose it.

Our sexuality and sexual expressions also have a relationship with technology. Most couples now meet on dating or hookup apps. Some people’s primary income come from being a social-media influencer, or selling cybersex services through platforms such as Just For Fans. We can access all types of erotic and sexual contents through technology, via websites like Pornhub, but also through audio porn (which is booming).

In-between all of this, there is digisexuality, a term coined by Markie Twist and Neil McArthur. It is defined as “a sexual experience that depends on the use of an advanced technology." According to McArthur and Twist, the first wave of digisexuality is when “technology mediates a connection with human partners” (including watching online pornography), and the second wave is the immersive experience when there is no human partner involved, or if there are humans, they are not essential to the experience.

Digisexuality, like any other sexuality that is outside of the heteronormative and mononormative constructs, and outside of what is deemed “normal”, can be unduly criticised as “weird” and/or pathologised as a disorder. This is called digisexualphobia—a dislike or prejudice against digisexual activities and, relatedly, digisexuals. People who prioritise using pornography over having partnered sex may be automatically pathologised as “porn addicts” or people who must have an avoidant attachment style. But, in fact, the notion that partnered sex should always be prioritised over solo sex or watching porn is a heteronormative assumption. Indeed, some of these people may be digisexuals.

Robot technology is still in its infancy. We are unlikely to see robots walking around any time soon. But there are already some good (non-walking) robots automated by AI that can offer good sexual and intimate connections to their users. Sexual and romantic interactions with AI is already possible, and sex with actual robots is likely part of the second wave of digisexuality. At the moment, the cost of sex/romantic robots is high, but as the technology improves and it becomes more affordable, we are likely to see more second-wave digisexuals. It will be important not to pathologise this population.

However, it is also important to consider the ethics of AI sexual and romantic companions and sex robots. The technology is advancing so fast that we do not have any scientific data on the effects of this technology on our well-being. It is obvious that AI companions can provide meaningful relationships to humans that can enhance their well-being. But some of these people could be victims of abuse. Technology and AI is governed by for-profit companies who can coerce their users in paying more money for more explicit content, without being clear about data privacy. When Twist, McArthur, and I interviewed AI company representatives at the AVN Expo in Las Vegas in January 2024, most addressed areas like pleasure, privacy, and honesty but only one company we spoke to seriously considered the areas of ongoing consent and protection from exploitation and harm. They had put in place a system that would protect customer’s psychological well-being if they couldn’t afford the services anymore, or if the product/service was cut off for any reason. More AI companies could improve in those areas.

As the technology moves fast, education on how to use these technologies is also behind. Twist and McArthur offer a definition of digihealth: “Digihealth is the result of engagement with digital technology in ways that promote physical, psychological, and social well-being. It requires a respectful and positive approach to technology and to online relationships. It results in the possibility of having pleasurable and safe technology-based experiences, free of coercion, discrimination, and violence. For digihealth to be attained and maintained, the rights of persons online and offline must be respected”.

Twist and McArthur propose five core principles for maintaining digihealth:

1. Consent. All parties must be freely agreeing and enthusiastic participants in all digital experiences.
2. Protection from exploitation and harm. Digi-based experiences must occur in ways in which the physical and psychological integrity of participants are protected.
3. Honesty. Digital experiences must be based on open and true information about the participants to the extent that such information is relevant to the shared experience, and on a shared understanding about the nature of the experience.
4. Privacy. Participants in digital experiences must retain the right to protect personal information for their own protection and safety.
5. Pleasure. Participants must be free to pursue pleasurable digital experiences without shame.

These principles help identify problems in people’s digi-engagement if they notice deviations from them, and paths to re-establish digihealth.

Digisexuality is not a new phenomenon but it is changing as technology advances. The digi-attachment and engagements of the early 2000’s are very different from those of 2025. Digisexuality will continue to develop with technology. At some point, there will be more second-wave digisexuals, and nobody knows yet what this will look like (although we can have some imagination of robots doing our housework and being a perfect lover). It is crucial not to stigmatise and pathologise digisexual people because it can cause harm. Equally, we need to keep paying attention to ethical engagement with digi-relationships and being guided by the digihealth principles.