Burnout Isn't Always About Working Too Much

Source: Andrei Askirka/Shutterstock

Did you know that a fire burning out often produces more visible smoke than a fire burning at its peak? Burnout works in much the same way. Before the flame goes out, there are often smoke signals we overlook. Recognizing them cues us that it’s time to rethink how we're approaching our workdays.

Several known workplace issues lead to burnout: the culture of an organization, workload, lack of control, unfairness, and inadequate support. In my clinical experience, there are also interpersonal and cognitive patterns that can intensify feelings of burnout, especially in highly capable professionals. Actual workload only tells part of the story, sometimes it’s also the emotional weight we’re carrying from the habits we bring to work that are adding to our exhaustion.

These habits, drawn from principles I discuss in my book Beyond Happiness: The 6 Secrets of Lifetime Satisfaction, (Guttman, 2023), fall into five patterns of behavior:

1. Assuming Responsibility For Everything

Many capable people feel a sense of ownership for work that may fall outside of their job responsibilities. As a result, we micro-manage, or feel a sense of hyper-responsibility for everyone’s work. This leads to chronic work vigilance, an overloaded brain, resentment, and mood swings. “If I don’t do it, it won’t get done,” is the code we live by. It’s that code that is exacerbating our burnout. This code is based on an assumption, not reality.

Pausing and recognizing what can be delegated is key. We need to focus on tolerating the discomfort of sitting with the anxiety of not being in constant control. Try these exercises. Challenge yourself to delegate one task a day and build from there. Take a 10-minute break in the middle of the day. Put a boundary around lunchtime, so your brain can reboot and you can eat. Break the habit of assuming responsibility that was never really yours and you will be making one step forward in reducing burnout.

2. People-Pleasing Instead of Setting Boundaries

We often think about people-pleasing as a behavior we do with family members and friends, but I have also seen this frequently in work environments. Fear of disappointing others exists everywhere. We want reinforcement for our work product, so we work longer than we should or take on someone else’s work seeking that approval. Then resentment starts to build as we fear setting boundaries that may disrupt the desire for approval. The likelihood that a manager or co-worker will recognize and call out our hard work is slight. Since, as humans, we harbor a negativity bias (Vaish et al., 2008), we put the lack of feedback from managers in the “negative” feedback column. However, silence is just “neutral.” It’s not good or bad. This leaves us emotionally exhausted, chasing validation, leading to feelings of chronic stress and burnout. You can try these strategies. Say “no” unapologetically to one thing every day no matter how small. You will see with time that your relationships at work don’t change. This will build confidence; your identity won’t be tied to being helpful at work, and the boundaries you’ve set will contribute to a reduction in burnout.

3. Avoiding Difficult Conversations That Only Become Harder Over Time

Conflict avoidance at work may reduce your anxiety temporarily. However, since you’re only putting off the inevitable, your anxiety will continue to increase over time. This leads to a constant state of anticipatory anxiety. Frequently, when we are avoiding talking to someone, it’s because we’ve played out the entire conversation in our heads, catastrophizing the outcome. The problem with having this back-and-forth conversation with ourselves instead of the actual person is that it can inadvertently put a strain on the relationship since we’ve anticipated a negative outcome. Think back on a situation where you avoided a conversation. Once you had it, did it go the way you thought it would? I doubt it. I imagine it went much better. Another case of negativity bias. Instead of creating weeks or months of stress at work, which adds to feeling burned out, challenge yourself to a date and time for the conversation. Tell someone you’re going to do it, so you have built-in accountability. Relief will replace anticipation, reducing your overall anxiety and helping with burnout.

4. Living with Chronic Indecision

Many of us struggle with making decisions and suffer from analysis paralysis. We believe there is a right or wrong choice. However, with most decisions, the answer falls somewhere in a grey area, where both choices are “right,” and trying to analyze which choice your manager “wants” you to make will always ultimately come down to an educated guess. Making decisions at work demonstrates confidence. Asking someone else to decide for you shows insecurity. When you’re wracked with anxiety and fear, compulsively weighing options or needing decision confirmation, work output slows down. Most managers prefer you make decisions and move on, even if you have to change one or two of them. Chronic decision paralysis contributes to feelings of burnout. Challenge yourself to make one decision a day, no matter how small. Once that becomes less intimidating, continue to build from there.

5. Never Acknowledging What You've Accomplished Before Moving Onto the Next Task

It’s critical that you pause and reflect at work on the projects you’ve completed. Then give yourself the praise you deserve. You can’t rely on your manager remembering to tell you, “Job well done.” You need to do this for yourself. If we don’t reflect on our “wins” and just move onto the next task, we can feel taken advantage of or taken for granted in the workplace. You’d be surprised how many of my clients find this personal reflection to be useful even though you’re acknowledging yourself. When you move the goal post every time you accomplish something, your brain never receives the reward signal that something has been completed. Instead of alternating between effort and recovery, you get stuck in continuous striving. This can make you prone to burnout since you never give your nervous system permission to recover. Without recovery time, we eventually become less focused, less creative, and less resilient. The time you give yourself doesn’t have to be long, it just has to be intentional.

Sometimes recovering from burnout isn't about working fewer hours. It's about recognizing the "smoke signals," the hidden habits that quietly add to your exhaustion. Once you identify them, you can begin changing the behaviors that fuel them. As you break these patterns, work becomes one part of your life rather than the force that defines it, and your life begins to feel like your own again.