Stonewall Strong

What gay men's struggles and successes reveal about resilience and community

John-Manuel Andriote

“The Inheritance” examines gay life in post-AIDS America.

Only Connect and You, Too, Will Find a Key to Resilience

Claiming our inheritance of courage and heroism offers a sense of meaning, purpose, and belonging. It’s also key to living authentically and with resilience.

Poinsettias on the author’s father’s grave.

Cultivating Connection and Continuity Is Key to Resilience

Old photos, cemetery visits, and a grandfather’s ID bracelet become powerful tools in supporting good mental health.

The Holidays: Take What You Like and Leave the Rest

Old, unhealthy family dynamics can wreck our nerves during the holidays. A shift in focus and healthy boundaries can help us enjoy our family of origin without going insane.

Every Day Is Thanksgiving With the Right Outlook

Being grateful for our blessings every day is key to making us more resilient and less prone to being swept away by challenges.

John-Manuel Andriote with his mother Anna Andriote, in December 2017, while she was in the midst of a protracted medical ordeal.

A Loved One’s Suffering Summons Our Resilience

Healing from a traumatic experience requires learning to reframe the story of what happened. It’s work. But the payoff is when you are healed enough to be “strong” for a loved one.

Steve Cadwell reigns over the crowd at a June 23, 2019, live, staged reading from his poetry collection 'PoeMEMoir: Volume 2.'

What Autumn's Trees, and My Friend, Show Us About Resilience

You can make the autumn of your life its most brilliant season yet, like my friend Steve did. Even while he was living with a brain tumor.

The Conversation About HIV Is Changing

Biomedical HIV treatment and prevention are remarkable. But even the strongest drugs fail if we're too depressed, strung-out, or traumatized to take them.

Loose pile of crystal methamphetamine.

Meth Isn't Only a Rural Problem. Neither Are Solutions.

As "deaths of despair" rise in America, it's not surprising that so many already living with stigma turn to drugs to escape their pain. Meth actually makes their problems worse.

Hurricane Dorian barreling toward Florida and the east coast.

A Cat-4 Storm in the Heart and a Tough Decision About Mom

Weathering another "storm," a personal history of resilience comes to bear in making one of life's hardest choices.

How Resilient People Get Through Anticipatory Grief

Dealing with a loved one's impending death is tough. But you'll be better able to be present and provide care to your loved one if you also take care of yourself. Here's how.

Whether laughing so hard we cry, or happy crying, laughter is good for the body, mind, and soul.

How Camp and Gallows Humor Keep Us Alive and Resilient

Gay men long have used camp humor to cope with homophobia, and gallows humor to cope with deadly health crises.

The Stonewall Inn, 1969

Stonewall Showed the World Our Resilience

The 1969 Stonewall riots changed the way LGBTQ people tell the stories of our lives. Now we can speak about our courage and resilience, not our victimhood.

Before Stonewall was originally released in 1985. Its themes are as timely today as they were then.

Film: "Before Stonewall" Explores LGBTQ Pain and Resilience

"Before Stonewall" shows LGBTQ women and men surviving and thriving in the years when homophobia was the law of the land. What they knew about resilience is still relevant today.

AIDS at 38: Remembering Our Fallen, Celebrating Our Heroism

The HIV-AIDS epidemic traumatized gay men. It also showed us to be highly resilient and heroic. We need to celebrate those qualities and tell healing stories that highlight them.

An abandoned granite quarry in Connecticut evokes memories of old days and the strength of rock.

Memory and Hope Sustain Communities, Support Resilience

Keeping memories and hope alive help keep us going as individuals and communities. Visual reminders can keep us connected even to long-ago people and events that still inspire us.

Bill Bailey with John-Manuel Andriote, in Waterford, Virginia, October 6, 1991.

When a Hero Is Taken Too Young

We must keep alive and honor our heroes' memories because they show us how to live with courage and strength, just as Bill Bailey did until AIDS took his life when he was only 34.

The words we use to tell our stories can support our resilience, or undermine us.

Are You the Hero or Victim of Your Story?

What we let our challenges and traumas "mean" makes all the difference. The words and language we use to tell our stories make it either a heroic journey or a tale of woe.

Retired Episcopal Bishop V. Gene Robinson

LGBTQ Faithful Defy Stereotypes, Find Profound Resilience

There is a widespread perception that "all" religions reject LGBTQ people, and that "all" LGBTQ people reject religion. It's not true. Just ask these religious leaders.

The main characters of The Wizard of Oz, L-R: The Cowardly Lion; Dorothy Gale; Scarecrow; the Tin Man.

How Stonewall Brought the 'Oz' Rainbow Down to Earth

Gay men loved our female divas like Judy Garland. But Stonewall showed us our own power to create the lives and society we want here and now, not in a longed-for someday.

Reggie Williams

"We're Not Crippled. We Have Power!"

An early and strong leader among black gay men, Reggie Williams showed how to draw from black history, gay pride, and even a "ghetto" upbringing to prevent HIV and resist stigma.

The author with Virginia "Ginny" Apuzzo and Dr. Lawrence D. Mass, at the Stonewall National Museum, Wilton Manors, FL.

Real Heroes Say: "I Only Did What Had to Be Done"

Heroes dismiss the praise heaped on them. Their compassion, well-aimed outrage, and sense of justice model for us how we can be heroes, too.

Shine!

Choose to Shine Your Brightest in 2019

It takes work to bring out the natural shine in an object. The same goes for people.

Mementoes and framed photos of gay heroes and important moments in LGBTQ history adorn the walls of Julius' in New York City.

Embracing Our Heroic Legacy As 2019's "Stonewall 50" Begins

We can understand and appreciate our place in history when we consider those who came before us. Their stories of courage and daring can inspire us to be brave and more resilient.

The mirror ball has been a fixture of dance venues since the 1800s.

Boogie Your Way to Better Mental Health

Dancing, and dance music, can lighten your mood, relieve anxiety, and even cut through the dark clouds of depression. Why do you think gay men love it?

Sharing Thanks with Family, However We Define Them

However you define "family," it's important to have people with whom you can share your gratitude at Thanksgiving and all year long.

Like a tree's roots, all our identities fuse together to form the person we know ourselves to be.

What's in a Name?

Choosing strong, empowering new words to describe your health condition can make all the difference in how you feel about living with it. That makes a stronger, happier you.

Caitlyn Jenner in 2015

Should the Government Define Your Gender?

Transgender Americans are just one of the minority groups feeling persecuted in Trump's America. But their fight for equality is a fight for good health and a stronger country.

Gay History Shows the Power of Defining Ourselves

Gay men with AIDS insisted they be known as 'people with AIDS,' refusing to let a diagnosis define them. They offer a lesson for everyone.

Autumn Is a Powerful Reminder to Live While We Are Alive

Summer's ripening into autumn provides a perfect metaphor for healthy aging. Celebrating fall's colors and coolness brings renewed energy.

What a Flooring Contractor Taught Me About Shame-Busting

Tired of feeling weighed down by secrets you keep because "what would others say"? Free yourself by rejecting the stigma that keeps you quiet.

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