Enjoy Your Joy: In Full or Microdoses

My client Dave was beyond burned out. He had so much to celebrate in his life: a growing business, a family, and a close-knit community he could give back to. But, through years of overworking, everything he had built had sapped his energy. Stretched so thin, Dave couldn’t find any pleasure in any of the realms he had worked so hard to create.

What Dave needed more than anything (even more than rest) was a reminder of that joy. So I asked him, “Where do you find joy in your life?”

Dave paused, thinking. Then, slowly, as he began to speak, he lit up from within. He painted a vivid picture of rolling around and wrestling with his 4-year-old son, playing silly face-making games with his 3-month-old daughter, going kayaking with his wife, trash-talking with his fantasy football league, and mentoring young entrepreneurs in his community.

What struck me wasn’t just that these activities made him smile; it was how quickly his energy shifted as he described them. Joy was still present in his life, but it had been pushed to the sidelines, reserved for spare moments that never seemed to come.

I invited Dave to experiment for two weeks. The “assignment” was simple: Intentionally carve out time for joy. A weekly kayaking date with his wife. Daily play sessions with his kids. He was hesitant at first, convinced that the last thing he needed was more time away from the work ahead of him. But ultimately, he agreed that two weeks of diminished productivity was a worthwhile sacrifice to make.

And, two weeks later in our session, Dave shared something powerful. He said that he had actually been more productive since he started implementing these “joy sessions” (or joy breaks). Describing his time with his daughter, he shared:

“Even 30 seconds of holding and smiling with her completely uplifts my mood. I’m more present and relaxed in the meetings right after, and everyone else’s mood seems to be affected as well. Our discussions tend to be more creative and productive on the whole.”

Joy isn’t just a luxury. It’s a resource. When we make time for what lights us up, we become more grounded, connected, and open. Sometimes, just 30 seconds of silliness can change the tone of your entire day.

Research Reveals: Even Small Joys Have Big Impact

In my interviews with spiritually intelligent people, nearly all described how joy fueled their love of life. One notably shared, “There is an absolute joy of having the opportunity to be a part of the celebration of life. And that doesn’t mean that I don’t experience pain or grief. But even amidst pain or grief, there’s a deep sense of… joy and celebration of being alive.”

Research has uncovered remarkable results about joy’s impact, from making teams more creative[i] to supporting emotional intimacy between couples.[ii] Quite recently, a UCSF[iii] study called the “Big Joy Project” surveyed nearly 18,000 participants who engaged in simple daily acts of joy over one week. Participants showed significant increases in well-being, along with reductions in stress. I also found it notable that these benefits were especially strong for people from disadvantaged groups, such as those with lower income or from racial/ethnic minorities, and for young people as well. And the more consistently people practiced, the greater the gains.

While this trial happened recently, joy’s effect on our health has been studied for years. Social and positive psychology fans might be familiar with the work of Barbara Fredrickson, namely her broaden-and-build theory[iv] of positive emotions. This theory posits how positive emotions might have been important to survival—undoing the cardiovascular effect of negative emotions.[v] Indeed, frequent positive emotion expression like smiling has been linked to reduced inflammation, lower stress, and even greater longevity.[vi] As George Bernard Shaw writes, “We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.”

Your Turn: Reframe Through Joy

Think of a small problem you've been grappling with. As you bring it to mind, notice your body—your facial expression, posture, tension, breathing, and overall energy.

Now shift your focus. Recall a recent moment of joy. Maybe it was a time you laughed uncontrollably, lost yourself in a song, danced with yourself in front of a mirror, entered a creative flow, spotted a cute baby, or simply savored a bite of chocolate.

Close your eyes and imagine yourself in that joyful moment. Picture it vividly, like a hologram glowing in the center of your chest. Take a few deep breaths, and let the memory come fully alive. Now, return to the original problem. How does it feel now? What’s changed in your body, your mood, or your outlook? Are new solutions or perspectives beginning to emerge?

Happiness Essential Reads

A Detour on the Path to Happiness

The Happiness Taboo

Joy, like any spiritual intelligence capacity, is a muscle. The more we work it, the easier it is to use. The more we choose joy, the more it chooses us.