Speaking About Trauma

Relationships

Do You Still Know Your Partner?

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on March 7, 2023

Despite their predictions, surprising research shows, long-term partners had more difficulty knowing a partner’s preferences than young couples did.

Despite their predictions, surprising research shows, long-term partners had more difficulty knowing a partner’s preferences than young couples did.

Marriage

Is Fidelity to Your Partner Enough to Sustain a Marriage?

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on January 11, 2023

In a culture filled with extramarital exploits, fidelity might seem crucial to a vital marriage. Actually, it requires that and much more.

In a culture filled with extramarital exploits, fidelity might seem crucial to a vital marriage. Actually, it requires that and much more.

Suicide

Teen Suicide Prevention: Parents Can Play an Important Role

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on November 30, 2022

The rising rate of teen suicides is an indicator that there is a state of emergency for adolescent mental health. Parents can help.

The rising rate of teen suicides is an indicator that there is a state of emergency for adolescent mental health. Parents can help.

Anger

Clashing With Your Partner? Use Constructive Coping Tools

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on September 2, 2022

A relationship that is truly loving is built on trust, safety, and intimacy. But there will inevitably be clashes. How can partners cope and protect their love?

A relationship that is truly loving is built on trust, safety, and intimacy. But there will inevitably be clashes. How can partners cope and protect their love?

Jealousy

Do You Understand the Jealousy in Your Relationship?

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on July 17, 2022

In the lives of couples, jealousy is a complex emotion with varied causes and consequences. Understanding its role in your relationship is crucial to a trusting and loving bond.

In the lives of couples, jealousy is a complex emotion with varied causes and consequences. Understanding its role in your relationship is crucial to a trusting and loving bond.

Embarrassment

School Shooters: A Path From Humiliation to Gun Violence

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on June 13, 2022

The relationship between humiliation and violence is a potent and overlooked factor in understanding a school shooter's path to killing.

The relationship between humiliation and violence is a potent and overlooked factor in understanding a school shooter's path to killing.

Marriage

The Steps That Can Repair a Relationship After an Affair

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on May 24, 2022

While there is no doubt that an affair threatens the bond of any marriage, it need not result in a divorce. When both partners commit to repair their marriage, it is possible.

While there is no doubt that an affair threatens the bond of any marriage, it need not result in a divorce. When both partners commit to repair their marriage, it is possible.

Stress

On the Clock: Time as an Overlooked Source of Couple Stress

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on March 12, 2022

Couples argue about sex, money and kids. Less visible, but as stressful, couples also argue about time. A close look at the complexity of time offers new understanding and options.

Couples argue about sex, money and kids. Less visible, but as stressful, couples also argue about time. A close look at the complexity of time offers new understanding and options.

Sex

What Really Happens in Sexless Marriages

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on February 6, 2022

When sexual connection and intimacy stop between spouses, they often stay together, trapped in feelings of rejection, anger, and longing. The real trap is the silence between them.

When sexual connection and intimacy stop between spouses, they often stay together, trapped in feelings of rejection, anger, and longing. The real trap is the silence between them.

Relationships

Does Your Pet Play a Therapeutic Role in Your Relationship?

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on January 3, 2022

A close look reveals that, much like a therapist, pets often serve as the emotional “third” to couples. As such, they open emotional space for new perspectives and ways of relating.

A close look reveals that, much like a therapist, pets often serve as the emotional “third” to couples. As such, they open emotional space for new perspectives and ways of relating.

Attachment

Is There Room for Your Stuff and Your Partner?

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on November 28, 2021

We all have things that have particular meaning to us. The question is whether attachment to our stuff leaves room for our partner.

We all have things that have particular meaning to us. The question is whether attachment to our stuff leaves room for our partner.

Relationships

The Pros and Cons of Reconnecting With an Ex

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on November 7, 2021

Regardless of what we tell ourselves about the good old days, or that things will be different, reconnecting with an ex warrants crucial considerations.

Regardless of what we tell ourselves about the good old days, or that things will be different, reconnecting with an ex warrants crucial considerations.

Relationships

What Makes a “Thank You” So Difficult Between Partners?

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on October 22, 2021

If you are wondering why you rarely hear a “thank you” from your partner, the problem may not be a lack of love. It may be the imbalance of human adaptation versus appreciation.

If you are wondering why you rarely hear a “thank you” from your partner, the problem may not be a lack of love. It may be the imbalance of human adaptation versus appreciation.

Trauma

Tattoos After Trauma: 6 Qualities of Healing Potential

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on July 18, 2021

Man has always used his skin as a canvas to bear witness to pain and survival. As more Americans get tattoos, a close look reveals the healing qualities of tattoos after trauma.

Man has always used his skin as a canvas to bear witness to pain and survival. As more Americans get tattoos, a close look reveals the healing qualities of tattoos after trauma.

Marriage

Why You Should Consider an Affair, with Your Partner

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on May 25, 2021

Crisis and stress leave partners out of time, out of touch, and feeling out of love. They may need an affair—with each other. The dynamics of an affair can reignite a marriage.

Crisis and stress leave partners out of time, out of touch, and feeling out of love. They may need an affair—with each other. The dynamics of an affair can reignite a marriage.

Grief

5 Ways to Cope When a Pet Dies

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on May 7, 2021

Pets have always been a loving source of resilience, buffering pain, loss, and loneliness. What happens when a pet dies? How do we cope?

Pets have always been a loving source of resilience, buffering pain, loss, and loneliness. What happens when a pet dies? How do we cope?

Rejection Sensitivity

Can’t Risk Rejection for Connection? 5 Risk-Reducing Steps

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on April 16, 2021

While social connection is vital for health and happiness, fear of rejection can impede efforts to connect.

While social connection is vital for health and happiness, fear of rejection can impede efforts to connect.

Trauma

5 Reasons Gardening Can Help to Heal Trauma

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on March 28, 2021

After a frigid winter and a deadly pandemic, many feel traumatized and robbed of their capacity to cope. The garden opens paths of healing and possibility.

After a frigid winter and a deadly pandemic, many feel traumatized and robbed of their capacity to cope. The garden opens paths of healing and possibility.

Relationships

An Overlooked Couple Skill: Knowing When Silence Is Golden

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on March 19, 2021

Increasing couple communication is important, but an easily overlooked skill is knowing when it is best to say nothing.

Increasing couple communication is important, but an easily overlooked skill is knowing when it is best to say nothing.

Sex

Repairing Sexual Withholding in a Marriage

Suzanne B. Phillips, Psy.D., ABPP on March 8, 2021

The problem with sexual withholding in a marriage has far less to do with actually having or not having sex and much more to do with misunderstanding each other.

The problem with sexual withholding in a marriage has far less to do with actually having or not having sex and much more to do with misunderstanding each other.