A loving relationship can be an oasis in uncertain times, but nurturing it requires attention, honesty, openness, vulnerability, and gratitude.
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Laughter, pleasure, malice, and the pursuit of adult fun
Gina Barreca Ph.D.
I wanted to be Janis Joplin, but she was too sad to emulate; I wanted to be Joni Mitchell but she was too pretty to imitate; I wanted to be Grace Slick but she was way too cool.
Getting positions of influence or prestige without applying for them epitomizes white-male privilege. Generations have done it. Privately. With a handshake. They see eye-to-eye.
We might not know where we’ll end up, but when you find folks you can really laugh with, you know you’ve arrived.
Why was one of our Founding Father's dismissed as a "Filthy Little Atheist" by one of our Presidents? Why are Thomas Paine's patriotic ideas from 1776 making folks nervous today?
It’s not sex that made Mae West dangerous: it’s her refusal to accept the badge of shame others would pin on her that made her what some might, these days, call "a nasty woman."
We're not tourists here, my friends. This is our life, together and now. Unpack your bags. Decide how you'll go forward.
Looking up is an essential daily activity. We need to raise our eyes and be willing to see brightness or stars above even (or especially) when the world looks a little dark.
“The bonds are similar to marriage but formed differently: they are formed by shared hardships, dark humor, physical pains, fears and accomplishments."
To tell a heartbroken friend, “Why don’t you just stop torturing yourself? Why not get over it already?" is like scribbling condolences on a Post-It note outside a funeral home.
Time to toss away the depleted, crippled, hollowed-out and bankrupted words and clichés we've been substituting for original and clear thinking.
You can be high achieving, extroverted, sociable, and self-confident and be lonely. You can also be an eminent introvert, usually happy in cultivated solitude, and still be lonely.
There are people who, when given a compliment, immediately reply with: "Thanks, but...” “Thanks, but” is the motto of the sinister self who insists you’re not all you seem to be.
Even those who are not perfectionists show perfectionist traits when confined in tight quarters. Let's just admit that quarantine is not helping us all "shine."
As a lonely child raised by a lonely mother, I longed for friends. I now cherish them. Don't let lethargy or anxiety interrupt your connections.
Pamela Katz, screenwriter and author, discusses how superficial fears are connected to deeper global ones. She also mentions that Zoom has a "touch up my appearance” option.
She defined her "real source" of constant anxiety about working during COVID-19 as the “Rear Window Phenomena": watching others while also watching herself. Why is everybody else OK?
In a world where we can’t find safety and can’t discover who the “enemy” really is, even nightmares can offer relief.
Nurses are experts on human nature who recognize and attend to hidden wounds, disguised pains, and overlooked necessities. During the COVID-19 pandemic, we are especially grateful.
Life itself is a group project; we’ve all got a deadline. We have to forgive those who let us down the way we hope to be forgiven by those we’ve disappointed.
When I was 20, Jane Fonda at 40 looked better than I did. When I was 40, Jane Fonda at 60 looked better. Why would it have changed now?
Ever found yourself feeling as if too much is not enough?
Why on earth does anybody write? To make a story out of everything.
Learn the names of everybody you deal with on a regular basis and your life will be immeasurably better.
The greatest leaders aren’t at the head of the group; they are a part of a circle, indistinguishable from those who hold strong at their side.
Real romance doesn't rely on escaping from life; it depends on facing it together. Very little swashbuckling is involved and heaving bosoms are not mandatory.
I live for scraps. I want the burnt parts, the crispy pieces, the gravy and the bones. Small pieces and trifles, scraped off the sides, have the best flavor.
Unsurprisingly, perhaps, Jim Tilley’s novel was celebrated immediately upon publication for its clear, uncompromising, and complex depiction of a transgender adolescent, Jules.
Why is it more satisfying to trap speculation inside the cage of bet than simply to disagree, allow the question go free-range, and see what happens?
“They still sell Jean Nate, Gina. You can buy it at Walgreens. You can get it at Target. They didn’t stop making it just because you stopped buying it."
My problems, both emotional and cognitive, had to do with getting stuff in the right order: I couldn’t do it.
Gina Barreca, Ph.D., is a professor of English at UConn, and the author of It's Not That I'm Bitter: How I Learned to Stop Worrying About Visible Panty Lines and Conquered the World.