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Question and commentary on connections, both sexual and social
Isadora Alman MFT, CST
Ending a relationship requires reasons. They need not be bluntly truthful if the blunt truth will cause unnecessary hurt.
If you're considering an open relationship, here are some important points to consider.
Do you always initiate sex, or do you simply respond? Maybe it's time for a change. Here's how.
Keep the excitement of falling in love by remaining sweethearts even at the most hectic times in your life.
These "life hacks" will stand you in good stead whatever your age or relationship circumstances.
There are three major reasons a woman doesn't climax and several ways to deal with those situations.
Do you remember the best lover you ever had? What physical characteristics stand out in your memory?
Together alone may be lovely, but after months of quarantining with your dear housemate, there may come a time when it does not seem as cozy or romantic.
Telling someone you care about something you hate to say and that they are not going to want to hear will take some thought. Here are some tips for this difficult deed.
Enforced solitude or mandated togetherness is not what any of us would choose. Having no choice in living conditions is far from ideal. Here are some tips for your own situation.
Are your fights about having less sex or assembling furniture? You may be amazed (or not) to learn that some people enjoy fighting and would leave a too peaceful relationship.
Is your partner your best friend and does that work for you? Many people need something or someone else.
Thinking back to when you and your partner first met is sure to make you smile.
At what point after a loss are you aware of, or excited by, many new possibilities?
The "bad boy" and the "slut" are ever with us. In fantasy? In reality? As a realistic choice of life partner?
Is there an ideal time duration for any sexual act? Who determines it?
Togetherness used to sound cozy, but in these times it often sounds suffocating.
Lasting friendships, maybe not, but interesting personal connections can be made under the most unlikely circumstances.
As a therapist, I have been asked about the meaning of attractions that do not fit clients' worldviews.
When one partner breaks trust and cheats, does it have to mean the end of the relationship? Is it possible to recover from such a blow?
Holiday meals are often served with a huge helping of guilt. You do not have to eat it.
The fact that sex can be boring comes as astonishing to some and as a statement of all too familiar hopelessness to others.
Do you find sharing your bed with family member, friend, or lover a friendly act or an invasion of your privacy?
What are so many of us missing out on because we're not asking for what we want in bed?
Would you share a sexual dream with a co-worker? What do your dreams and fantasies say about you?
Can one predict the sexual interests of a nation by their Google searches for specific sexual terms?
Can an inexplicable fear of an unknown building be some sort of communication? If so, from whom, and what is being communicated?
I have never been able to wear high-heeled shoes and wonder how other women do. Are they more willing to suffer for the sake of beauty than I am?
Outdoor sex has a long history, and is often touted in the movies. Beware, however—like much in films, its pleasures shouldn't always be taken literally.
Kissing is much more than lips on skin—much, much more.
Isadora Alman, M.F.T., is a board-certified sex, marriage, and family therapist, lecturer, author, and syndicated advice columnist of "Ask Isadora."
I write about social skills and sexuality, all under the umbrella of communications. Clear communications—with oneself first, then with others—is the basis for getting what you want out of life.