30% of American football players gay? Not quite.

Are 30% of American football players gay?

The headline reads, "Over One-third Of American Football Players Had Sexual Relations With Men, Study Claims."

The hook repeats that astounding claim, only slightly stepping back from the headline by admitting we're not talking about all football players here, but former high-school jocks: "A study of former high-school American Football players has found that more than a third said they had had sexual relations with other men."

Only if you plod into the article do you learn that the study included just 47 men who had previously played high-school ball but couldn't make the team once they got to the university level and who had opted to become -- wait for it...

Cheerleaders.

Yes, this is the sort of sloppiness that all too often passes for "science" these days. Sociologist Dr. Eric Anderson, of the University of Bath -- a town made famous by Chaucer's randy wench -- included kissing, mutual masturbation and, get this, two men having sex with one woman as evidence of homosexual behavior. His study was to be published in the journal Sex Roles in January, according to the article.

Dr. Anderson says he was the first openly gay high-school sports coach in the U.S. (how would he know?), and author of a book on gay athletes.

Now, former high-school football players who become cheerleaders in college would hardly qualify as a representative sample of football players in general -- unless you're looking to get your "research" published in Sex Roles, apparently.

And including two men having sex with one woman as having experienced "sexual relations with men" strikes us as being a bit of a stretch. Having interviewed several professional athletes on this very topic for our book, we can tell you that they did not in any sense consider themselves to be having sex with each other when they were with the same woman. The athletes we spoke with (and, we presume, the women involved) frame the experience as both men having sex with her simultaneously. For them, this is a hyper-heterosexual encounter. Quite the opposite of Dr. Anderson's take on the situation.

For a more serious-minded look at homosexuality in sports, check out Esera Tuaolo's book or profile in the New York Times. For the record, Tuaolo reports having felt utterly isolated by his sexuality.

Famed zoologist Desmond Morris wrote an illuminating essay years ago called The Soccer Tribe, in which he discusses group sexual practices among professional soccer players. He found that woman-sharing was a common practice that served to enhance team-solidarity. If Dr. Anderson thinks having sex with a woman within sight of another naked man qualifies as gay sex, one wonders whether he'd include all the men who have viewed pornography featuring other men having sex with women (which would be almost all heterosexual porn).

Wouldn't that make almost all men gay, Dr. Anderson?