What It Means to Be "Awakened," and Why It Matters

What is the meaning of life? That’s quite a big question.

Philosophy and religion have long started their reflections with the fact that we all face death. If I will eventually die, what meaning do my daily efforts hold? The answer might lie in changing my perspective on myself and life.

As philosopher Martin Heidegger put it, we are "thrown into existence," and we may never find a clear answer to what life is all about. While human existence may feel random and beyond our control, the question itself might become less important over time.

In the growing field of positive psychology, finding a sense of purpose is seen as a key part of well-being. Purpose can come from many sources—a job, family, financial success, or a passionate hobby.

However, research suggests that it’s not just about what we see as a meaningful goal but rather how we live our lives. A major factor is self-transcendence—going beyond personal concerns and connecting with something bigger. This might sound abstract, but it simply means focusing less on oneself and more on caring for others and the world around us.

In my previous article, "Gaining Happiness by Losing Yourself," I discussed how the pursuit of happiness often revolves around self-interest. This hedonic approach brings pleasure when I can indulge, but it also creates discomfort when my desires go unfulfilled—say, if the potential partner I desperately seek has no interest in me.

My pursuit of personal pleasure thus results in fluctuating happiness, dependent on life’s unpredictable circumstances, which are often beyond my control. It’s clear that the world wasn’t designed to cater to my personal desires.

This idea isn’t just a spiritual notion or an abstract belief—it’s backed by psychological research (Seligman, 2011; Yaden et al., 2017). Studies show that self-centered individuals often hold rigid expectations, which frequently lead to disappointment. In contrast, those who focus on others and embrace life’s uncertainties tend to be more resilient and experience greater happiness including positive emotions like love and compassion.

It seems that children naturally have the ability to easily connect and merge with others and the world around them. Recent research by Donna Thomas from the University of Central Lancashire in the UK shows how children's identities can meaningfully blend with those of their close peers or family members (Thomas, 2023). These experiences often occur during crises, when they’re in nature, or while playing, and can involve deep empathy for others, exceptional modes of knowing such as feeling their friends’ wishes, or knowing their thoughts.

Here’s some good news from developmental psychology research on the elderly: As people age, they generally worry less, take on more responsibility, and get along better with others. In other words, we tend to become calmer, more mindful, and kinder over time (Staudinger & Kunzmann, 2005).

While personal growth usually happens gradually, it can sometimes accelerate—or even occur suddenly—following a life-changing event. A life transformation can come from a mystical encounter in nature, from the intake of psychedelics, or following a life-threatening condition leading to a near-death experience. What people typically report afterward is that they had less awareness of self and time and that they felt more connected with others and the world.

Positive life changes can sometimes also happen after difficult phases in life, like losing a loved one, being diagnosed with cancer, or struggling with depression. After such experiences, individuals have learnt what is truly important in life.

A symbolic awakening: a dandelion pushes itself through stones

Source: Oksana Gutina / Used with permission

Where "Awakening" Fits In

Steve Taylor, a researcher at Leeds Beckett University in the UK, studies "spiritual awakening" (Taylor, 2017). Many people assume that achieving spiritual awakening requires years of meditation and strict spiritual discipline.

However, like any psychological concept, awakening comes in degrees. Even ordinary people, going about their daily lives without any background in traditional spirituality, can experience it after a transformative experience.

Taylor and his colleagues recently developed a questionnaire based on the experiences of awakened people (something he's written about for Psychology Today). My team in Freiburg translated and similarly evaluated a German version of this Inventory of Secular/Spiritual Wakefulness (WAKE), and together, we published our English and German findings (Kilrea et al., 2023).

The WAKE questionnaire now allows researchers to measure levels or degrees of awakening. The identified facets of awakening include greater well-being, a stronger sense of connection with others and life in general, less attachment to thoughts and emotions, more genuine relationships, and a decreased fear of death.

Spirituality Essential Reads

Faith-Sensitive Therapy

The Psychological Benefits of Spirituality

That brings us back to the initial question of What is the meaning of life? I claimed that an answer may not be so important when we do not care so much about what the meaning is (in the sense of a definite and positive answer) but how we live our lives.

But what the research shows is that people who are more awakened are relatively less self-absorbed with themselves and care more for others and the environment. The decreased or even absent fear of death could be a consequence of ego loss. Someone who is self-centered takes his or her issues to be more important than the conditions of others, especially concerning the annihilation of the precious self.

How can you detect an awakened person? It's not the people who boast about meditating for two hours a day for the past 20 years, preferring to be alone, away from ordinary others. Rather, it's those who can connect with others through warmth, charisma, and empathy, and who, with a sense of humor, don't take themselves too seriously. These are perhaps individuals who have experienced transformative challenges in their lives and, over time, liberated themselves to become the lovable person they are today.

What is the meaning of life? Don’t get too caught up in seeking an answer just for your own sake.