How to Reduce Harm and Increase Your Well-Being

How can we possibly reduce harm? It's something I've been meditating on lately.

In particular, I've wondered how we can heal the blaming and shaming that seems to be dividing so many. One approach is practice compassion, or non-harm, towards others, which is a topic that has been talked about frequently throughout history by such persons as Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jesus, and the Buddha.

Yes, the mystery of being is closer than you think!

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Given how our world is infused with technology, you might be tempted to say that technology can provide the answer. Well, if that were the case, the world be experiencing an epidemic of love and kindness right now!

Here's the thing: Compassion is not an answer that is searched or found quickly by using a search engine or AI tool. Compassion is a practice that takes time. For example, the compassion practice I learned in the monastery many years ago is something I still practice today. It's invaluable, especially when I'm stressed or under a deadline.

It's worth remembering, too, that in today's world we are primed to make quick decisions. Technology offers quick information—which of course, is not the same as the experience and process of developing loving-kindness and compassion.

Any wisdom practices we apply get deepened as we mature over the course of a lifetime. Let's begin with a quote by Max Planck, the founder of quantum theory. He wrote:

"Science cannot solve the ultimate mystery of nature. And that is because, in the last analysis, we ourselves are part of nature and therefore part of the mystery that we are trying to solve."

A loving-kindness or compassion practice technology is incapable of doing. It invites us to experience the mystery of being by using our own consciousness and "beingness." When you think about that, it's brilliant—and it works across cultures, as shown in research that studied both Vietnamese and American employees. Researchers concluded, "The study provides robust evidence that compassion-based practices can serve as a universal, yet culturally adaptable, pathway to employee well-being."

Loving-kindness improves well-being because it helps us recognize that the world and all the living beings in it are not machines or pieces on a game board—to be moved around and manipulated. Instead, practitioners are steeped in the truth of how humans are intrinsically woven into the fabric of all things.

A Simple Compassion Practice

In some workshops, I've had people look into the eyes of someone they didn't know for up to three minutes in silence. This is not an easy thing to do, but many were stunned by the experience. Many persons shared how it was like looking in a mirror. They actually pictured themselves reflected in the other, which is the power of empathy.

Have you ever looked at someone, even an intimate friend or partner, for that long in silence? Probably not. (And I wouldn't advise it without proper guidance because even if you want to try it, the other person may not.)

Even though you may never try the above practice, you can still get the feeling of how to view others through the fresh eyes of compassion. These words from the Buddha speaks to this idea:

"See yourself in others.

All beings tremble before violence.

All fear death.

All love life.

See yourself in others.

Then whom can you hurt?

What harm can you do?"

Consider, too, that to some degree, we've lost the frequent caring and nurturing gaze of others, which links us to our ancestral thread. These days, it is computer devices and phones that often command our gaze.

Instead of peering deeply into the eyes of another person for several minutes, you can do the following as a simple practice:

• Just be fully present with another while letting go any complaints you might have about the person's faults.
• Imagine looking into the eyes of someone who you blame for various problems (locally or globally). Now, that person is no longer out of context, but is relatable, connected and part of your world.

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Remember, too, that we are all part of the growing and adapting evolution of human-kind and human endeavors, like a thread stretching back thousands of years.

Conclusion

All is context and connection. Without context and without compassion and empathy for others, there is sure to be distortion, righteousness, pain, and suffering.

So we must ask: Can we move from the limited, machine-like fix it mentality—where all things are treated as lifeless objects? Is it possible? Could we cultivate a more spacious understanding and kindness for all living, breathing beings who share this planet with us?

We are in this together. Repeating the Buddha's advice and greeting others with openness, you show an open, kind heart and reduce harm for all of us. May we all spread seeds of kindness, compassion, and gratitude each day.