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Therapy

Virtual Play Therapy With Children: Is It Worth It?

Virtual play therapy: Parents may be hesitant to sign up for more screen time.

Key points

  • Play therapy is different when done virtually, but it can be as or more effective.
  • Virtual play therapy sessions reveal the digital experiences of children and lead to important interventions.
  • Physical experiences can be missed in virtual therapy and clinicians require innovative ways to discover them.
A groovy background with a child sitting at a laptop with headphones on.
A groovy background with a child sitting at a laptop with headphones on.
Source: Created by the author and images used with permission.

In today’s world, children are growing up surrounded by screens. From interactive classrooms to video games and YouTube, SnapChat, TikTok, Instagram, and all the apps millennial and Gen Xers do not even know about yet, the digital environment is an undeniable part of their everyday lives. While some parents are introducing tech-free zones and screen limits, the reality is clear: digital childhoods are here to stay.

This raises an important question for clinicians and caregivers alike: Should children have more screen time through virtual therapy sessions with a play therapist?

Yes. When done thoughtfully, virtual play therapy can offer powerful benefits to children, particularly in a world that is already tech-integrated.

The Upside of Virtual Play Therapy

1. Digital Culture Becomes a Clinical Entry Point
Children often form deep connections with the digital content they consume. In virtual play therapy, therapists can observe and explore these connections, including over-identification with characters or themes from TV shows, games, or social media. These discussions become valuable therapeutic tools.

Parents of a client of mine were worried about their child’s impulses to derive elaborate punishments for himself and were concerned that he was bordering self-hatred. After my first meeting with him, I found that his favorite character was Dobby, the house-elf who sacrifices himself constantly. The connection was clear for the parents when we discussed it and this would have been missed if we were meeting solely in person. I had to watch clips of the character to understand the over-relating the client was doing.

2. Encouraging Open Conversations About Online Content
In a trusted therapeutic relationship, children are more likely to disclose troubling or confusing media experiences. They may talk about disturbing YouTube videos, cyberbullying, or risky online behaviors—opening doors to essential discussions around boundaries, safety, and self-worth.

One of my 7-year-old clients always asked to watch pranking videos on YouTube. When watching with her, I realized a lot of her mean behaviors came out of watching these videos on repeat. Without conversations regarding the content she was watching, she just integrated what she was seeing into her personality– especially because the videos had no talking, just music. We had important discussions about the impacts of these pranks in order to build empathy in the client, which was completely missing from the videos.

3. Increased Accessibility and Attendance
Virtual therapy removes major barriers for many families. With fewer missed sessions due to transportation issues or tight schedules, consistency in care improves. This is especially critical for children who thrive on routine and structure.

One of my clients was dealing with a parent who had a new health diagnosis and through that transition, the family never missed a session. In places like New York City, getting around after school can mean getting stuck in brutal traffic, but jumping into a virtual session means clients are more willing to attend sessions after basketball practice.

4. Expanding Access to Affirming, Culturally Responsive Care
Perhaps one of the most transformative aspects of virtual therapy is its potential to bridge equity gaps. Children from LGBTQIA+ families, and Black, Brown, Indigenous, Muslim, and disabled communities often face long waitlists or a lack of local providers who share or understand their lived experiences. Virtual therapy allows families to connect with therapists who align with their values, identities, and needs—without geographic limitations. This is a critical step in decolonizing the private practice industrial complex.

The Downsides to Consider

While virtual play therapy is promising, it comes with challenges:

  • Lack of Control Over the Environment: Therapists can't fully manage or monitor the child's setting. Who else is in the room? Is there true privacy? Are there distractions?
  • Missed Physical Cues: Some physiological signs—such as fidgeting, body odor changes, or subtle movements—may be less visible virtually. This can impact a therapist’s full understanding of the child’s emotional and physical state. I had a client who had tics and repetitive anxiety movements that I missed until she mentioned them.

Tips for Successful Virtual Play Therapy

To enhance the virtual experience for children, consider:

Sending a Play Therapy Kit: Mail or deliver a basic kit with tools like art supplies, puppets, sensory toys, or themed figurines. This helps create continuity in the therapeutic process and gives the child a sense of ownership and excitement about their therapy space.

Create a Code Word: The first thing I do with children in our virtual sessions is talk about confidentiality and create a code word so that I know if someone walks into the room while we are in session. This allows me to pause whatever we are talking about rather than continue to speak about the topic. One client of mine is questioning her gender identity and this is particularly important because while her parents are very supportive, she is not ready to jump into conversation with them. Parents don’t mean to intervene in sessions, but sometimes they need to share information to the child and the clinician cannot hear knocks on the door or see outside the view of the camera.

Virtual play therapy isn’t about increasing screen time just for the sake of convenience—it’s about evolving with the times. As therapists, our role is to meet children where they are, and right now, that place includes screens. When guided by ethics, intentionality, and creativity, virtual play therapy can be just as impactful—if not more so—than traditional in-person sessions.

To find a therapist, please visit the Psychology Today Therapy Directory.

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