Every Truth Comes After the Event

"Every truth comes after the event," the philosopher Alain Badiou once said.

It's tempting to view the widespread stress, anxiety, and sense of disconnection today as the culmination of such an event—one that reveals an uncomfortable truth: Few people dare to live authentically, as they are consumed by what others think of them.

This craving for social recognition is as old as humanity itself. But today, the fear of not fitting in undermines the courage it takes to live the life we truly desire.

From existential thinkers, we learn that anxiety is a basic condition of being human. Most of us, at some point, have felt inadequate. Rather than viewing anxiety as something purely negative, we might see it as a path toward self-understanding and growth.

However, instead of accepting this vulnerability, many people surrender their independence to a group identity. As a result, our time is marked by collective, exclusionary thinking—nationalism, separatism, narcissism.

It is stressful to worry constantly about others' opinions. Just as it is emotionally stifling to care only for one's own interests.

In Works of Love, Søren Kierkegaard discussed the concept of loving one's neighbor. For Kierkegaard, "the neighbor" was not defined by race, gender, sexuality, or religion. His greatness as a thinker lies in how his ethics embraced the full diversity of human life.

Today, openness has become a fixed position or identity—one that protects personal rights but no longer commits itself to the well-being of others. Such positions often foster a false sense of certainty that may feel safe but ultimately limits openness, empathy, and shared humanity.

This rigidity becomes a filter through which the world is judged. Are others friends or enemies? This war-like mindset—us versus them—is exhausting. It suppresses understanding and nuance, and the constant polarization is intensely stressful.

True self-knowledge and empathy arise in those moments when life—another person, an unexpected thought, or a disruptive situation—strikes us with such force we cannot explain what happened. These moments challenge us to let go of cherished beliefs and fixed positions because clinging to prepackaged answers is a way of not truly engaging with the world.

But when we meet life with humility, curiosity, and compassion, we begin to generate new ways of thinking, living, and relating—an effort to become worthy of what life presents us.

An example of such transformation could be the cultural shift in understanding consent following the #MeToo movement. That was a collective commitment to relational awareness. It reminded us that our well-being depends on others' well-being—and vice versa.

Sadly, when something powerful confronts the individual or society, the result is often the creation of yet another rigid position—another identity or opposition that becomes just as closed as the one it sought to replace.

The Absence of Philosophical Thinking

The current wave of stress and suffering is, at its core, a symptom of the absence of philosophical thinking. Philosophy is not about taking positions. It's about radical openness and attention. It doesn't care about being right or strengthening a fictional identity—it cares about understanding life, which can only be lived in connection with others.

Philosophy is not naïve—but it shares the newborn's wide-eyed attention and curiosity, which are quickly stifled by social systems: family, school, education, and the workplace, all of which promote rigid identities. Radical openness and attention in philosophy mean being receptive to new ideas, perspectives, and experiences without preconceived notions or biases.

Embracing Life With Empathy, Openness, and Attentiveness

Those who embrace life with empathy, openness, and attentiveness often experience a deep sense of belonging—one not based on sexuality, skin color, or gender but on shared life itself. Many of today's identity-based positions, whether tied to gender, race, religion, or idealistic systems, lack one crucial element: self-criticism.

Anxiety Essential Reads

Do You Excessively Seek Reassurance?

Is It "Mother’s Intuition" or Postpartum Anxiety?

So, how do we promote an unstrategic, radical form of attention together? How do we foster critical thinking that isn't about confirming our egos or group identities but about doing what is right?

One approach might be: Act in such a way that you cause the least harm to others.

If your position can only be affirmed by belittling others, it may not stand on its own. The better alternative may be to avoid fixed positions altogether and instead follow life's movements—on life's terms—as best we can. This requires a felt sense of interconnectedness.

Another approach: Act only in ways you would be willing to repeat.

The self-righteous person tries to eliminate all existential uncertainty and ambiguity, forgetting that we can never honestly foresee the consequences of our actions. Accepting anxiety enables us to respond more profoundly to life's challenges.

Philosophy isn't about what you should or must think. Moralism is stressful. Philosophy doesn't cling to rights—it seeks to bind us to one another and to life. Philosophical thinking moves with life's forces, such as love, loss, change, and uncertainty. It arises when something strange, foreign, or unknown breaks open our temporary convictions.

Those who dare to set aside their preferences will be touched by life in deeply binding ways. Those who cling tightly to identity and certainty commit not to live but only to themselves. In that sense, letting go of the vain ego is a deeply de-stressing act. It's a liberating act that frees us from the constraints of fixed positions and allows us to fully engage with life's complexities.

Badiou said that truth comes after the event. The truth is this:

Those who always say, do, and think the same things have never truly encountered the difference-making power of life.