There are ways to temper your toughest critic and take constructive control of your feelings.
Verified by Psychology Today
How to raise self-disciplined, connected, happy humans
Laura Markham Ph.D.
Any time you have a disagreement with your partner in front of your child, it's essential that you affectionately and explicitly "repair" the relationship.
Consider your interactions with your partner through your child's eyes.
Managing a child's anger is a multi-step process. For those who need the best techniques to be readily accessible, here's a cheat sheet outlining what to do when anger strikes.
Perfection isn't possible, and it isn't even the goal. The goal is love.
We're teaching kids how to be in relationship with another person.
For today, just choose less drama and more love. You'll be amazed at how far that takes you.
Love is always in the room with you, no matter what day it is, or what your faith may be. What better time to help your child listen for it?
Happiness comes from connection, meaning, and contribution—not from things.
When your children look back, will they describe a parent who communicated the spirit of the season with laughter, warm embraces, and joyful presence?
You can commit to a better way of handling low-level fear when it arises, before it spirals out of control.
It creates a home with a lot less drama, and a lot more love.
Our children need to feel seen, accepted, and encouraged, no matter what.
One great way to course correct when you see a collision coming, or when you find yourself sitting in a pile of emotional wreckage, is to ask for a "Do-Over."
Once you pause, you can make the choice to shift gears.
With preventive maintenance, you meet your child's needs before the unmet needs cause a breakdown.
Not only will appreciating yourself make you happier with the way you parent, you'll find you enjoy parenting more. See how long it takes your child to comment on the difference.
Kids really do rise to meet our expectations, as long as we stay connected.
After a good cry your child is happier, more affectionate, more cooperative.
Why would a child choose, over and over, to do the harder thing?
How do kids develop their sense of right and wrong?
Slow down, so you can listen.
The secret is managing our anger so we stay connected with our child while we set limits.
Every time you do this process, you diminish the emotional charge of one of your emotional triggers.
Ever wondered why one parent can keep a sense of humor in the face of a child's challenging behavior while another starts yelling?
The path to happiness requires you to accept and love yourself just the way you are, messy imperfections and all.
The most important factor is whether your child feels loved, unconditionally. That means she feels loved exactly as she is. Even when she's acting like a monster!
Remember, your child may be triggering them, but these are your emotions.
Observing what your child and other people are feeling, and commenting on it in a nonjudgmental way, teaches children to identify emotions in themselves and others.
Our fantasy of the perfect family holiday can drive us to do more, more, more – but more of what we didn't need to begin with can't fill those deep longings. There's a better way.
When your emotions are "triggered," your child looks like the enemy. You can't be the parent your child deserves at those times.
Laura Markham, Ph.D., is the author of Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How To Stop Yelling and Start Connecting.