Is There Truly an Epidemic of Narcissism?

The “Me Generation” came of age in the 1970s, during what the writer Tom Wolfe famously called the “Me Decade.” But those adolescent Baby Boomers were mere “posers,” according to popular psychologist Jean Twenge, compared to those who grew up in the 1980s. That’s when self-absorption, entitlement, and the callous disregard of others went truly mainstream and shaped what Twenge dubbed the “Me Generation” in her 2006 book of that title.

Ego inflation continued apace, and a few years after publishing her book, Twenge and a colleague diagnosed a “narcissism epidemic” infecting the whole population. Not long after, in a 2013 cover story, Time magazine named post-1980 Millennials the “Me, Me, Me Generation,” “lazy, entitled narcissists.” Since then, despite strong pushback from some researchers, widespread claims of rampant “narcissism” have become commonplace. And young people themselves are convinced that the label accurately describes their generation.

The psychologists, journalists, and other observers telling the narcissism story have attributed the root causes of the outbreak to several general sources, including the self-esteem movement that arose in the 1970s—everyone is special, all must have prizes—and the spread of celebrity culture. Of course, parents get their share of the blame, cited for abandoning their disciplinary role and seeking their children’s approval, stroking their egos, and protecting them from every hardship. And, unsurprisingly, social media no sooner appeared than it became the prime suspect. The evidence of vanity and self-obsession was there for all to see—people posting selfies, clamoring for attention, and polishing their profiles into shiny idealized illusions.

There is no question that a concern with the self is a dominant characteristic of our time. But is narcissism? Amid all the talk of the harm attributed to social media, I have been exploring what people use it for, what needs they expect it to meet. In a prior post, I considered the need for “self-formation,” made inescapable by the ever-expanding range of options we all face. Whether we like it or not, each of us must discover or author (and revise as necessary) our personal identity and project it in such a way as to make it intelligible to strangers. Few, if any, of our life choices will be made by default. The task is ours and necessarily involves a self-referencing orientation and acts of self-assertion. Does it also lead to self-fascination and indifference to the general good?

Narcissism vs. Expected Self-Promotion

The question is whether, in our social context, we can distinguish “narcissism”—as a metaphor for selfishness or self-absorption—from the ordinary focus on self that is now central to decision-making and norms of success in our society. Psychologists measure individual differences in grandiose narcissism (there is another subtype, “vulnerable narcissism,” but it is characterized by a fragile self-concept and low self-esteem) with a questionnaire of 40 (or more) paired statements called the Narcissistic Personality Inventory (NPI). In those pairs, one statement represents a narcissistic trait and the other a non-narcissistic one. Persons responding must choose the statement they feel best reflects their personality. Here are a few examples:

• I am no better or worse than most people.
• I think I am a special person.
• I have a natural talent for influencing people.
• I am not good at influencing people.
• I will be a success.
• I am not too concerned about success.
• The thought of ruling the world frightens the hell out of me.
• If I ruled the world, it would be a better place.

It is not my aim to evaluate the NPI. But to get a sense of the imprecision, vagueness, and sheer anachronism of so much narcissism talk, imagine yourself talking to a college guidance counselor or to a prospective employer at a job interview. Which one of those statements would be the “right” one to affirm?

Hint: The whole point of the college application essay is to demonstrate your unique qualities in a way that lifts you above the other aspirants.¹ And what employers want, according to the influential study presented in The New Spirit of Capitalism, are employees who (1) are leaders, who retain the initiative in their projects and know how to take risks and make new connections; (2) stand out from the crowd, make a convincing self-presentation, and invest their personal originality in their activities; and (3) more of the same.²

Our notions of individualism set a high store on personal accomplishment, self-ownership, initiative, internalized control, and uniqueness. Now, we might say, the idea that anyone can be exceptional has been democratized.

Consider also what has gone missing. Whether derived from religious conviction, civic virtue, kinship, or customary patterns of life, most people once shared common sources of aspiration, motives, and values to guide choices and endow life with meaning. With the attenuation of these sources for many, the situation has changed. Now, each person is constrained to navigate by the compass of his or her own concerns and personal values.

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We now even speak of a moral duty, enforced by our institutions, to make choices based on self-interest—my life, my future, my happiness. The old moral sources served to restrain the pursuit of self-interest, with the good defined primarily in terms of wider community benefit. “Now, instead,” to quote the psychologist Roy Baumeister, “people are free to do what is best for themselves individually, with a clear conscience because of the presumptive moral duty to the self.”³

We might call this new duty a self ethic. It is less an ideal than an adaptation to our loss of cultural guides to action. It reflects the paradoxical way that self-realization has become an organizational requirement. Given its imperative of an optimal self, we can see why this self ethic might be confused with a narrow self-love or disregard for others.

Beleaguered, Not Grandiose

The handwringing about narcissism misses the mark. The effects of our predicament do not promote grandiosity or the assertion of some imperial self. Something like the opposite seems to be the case. Studies going back decades suggest that self-image and “ego strength” have declined over time, while reported feelings of emptiness, uncertainty, and inadequacy have increased.⁴ Though largely unreported in the press, efforts to replicate the original claims for a “narcissism epidemic” have failed.⁵ And all the comparing that people do on social media does not boost self-confidence but undermines it.

Narcissism is not a helpful category. If anything, beleaguered or demoralized might be better terms for the effects of our self ethic at the individual level.

Facebook/LinkedIn image: Just dance/Shutterstock