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Fear
Why Some People Always Seem to Succeed and Others Never Get Started
How to get out of the starting blocks.
Posted February 15, 2021 Reviewed by Lybi Ma
Why is it that some people seem always to succeed and others can never seem to get started? Is it analysis paralysis? Could be. Perhaps it is the dreaded perception of perfection which seems unattainable no matter how hard we try? I have spent a career studying extreme high achievers. One of the pillars that sets them apart is how they approach challenges. They tell themselves, “I have to try at least.”
High achievers fear not trying more than they fear failing. They likely feel they have nothing to lose, and any advancement, even a small one, would be a step forward. They ensure a high degree of control over many aspects of their work, including the objectives, pacing, content, methodology, and outcomes assessment.
Break it down into small parts
Taking on a new challenge can be overwhelming. Break it down into small manageable parts. When writing a book, you do not do it in one sitting. Even one chapter is not completed in one sitting. Two pages sound more manageable. Do you have a PowerPoint deck you need to put together for a presentation? Start with an outline, then work on a color scheme, finally enter your content, one section at a time. Set aside a time block to edit your slides.
Control what you can control
If you want to find what to worry about, there is always something. High achievers ‘control what they can control.' Use your energy and efforts to determine how to manipulate what is in your control. When variables and data changes, pivot accordingly.
Done is good
When working on my doctorate, one thing my mentors always told me: “Done is good.” You can obsess over every detail, but you will never finish. Sometimes, finishing is the task. It does not need to be perfect. You will likely get feedback and make revisions afterward. You want that as feedback is an opportunity for enhancement.
Failure does not mean finished
Understand that failure is a natural part of the process and a learning opportunity. Glean what you can from every challenge and use that as ammunition to improve your future performance. Sometimes just being in it is proof to yourself and others that you tried.
Focus on ‘how’ instead of ‘if’
Focus less on wondering if you will overcome the challenge. Believe that you can. Focus instead on how you will overcome the latest hurdle. Use your energy to strategize and come up with a plan. Instead of hearing ‘no’ think ‘not yet.’
Mistakes, challenges, and accomplishments of the past will shepherd you into the future. Use your history as a compass, learn from your previous experiences as well as that of others. Fear not trying more than you fear failing. If you do not try, you will not have the opportunity to succeed. What is the worst that will happen? Give it a try, for the sake of trying.
