The Psychology of Pivoting

Sometimes the path forward isn’t straight—it’s a turn you didn’t expect, leading somewhere even better.

Source: Wasabi Publicity | Adobe | Michael Brown | Used with permission

Let’s be honest—progress doesn’t come in a straight line. Not for me, not for you, not for anyone. I used to think that if I just worked hard enough and stuck to the plan, I’d land exactly where I wanted.

But life doesn’t care about your timeline.

Illness, betrayal, burnout, job loss, natural disasters—any of these can flip your world. And sometimes, it’s the things that don’t happen—the goals unmet, the relationships that stall—that require us to pause and reassess.

Here’s what I know for sure: Real progress isn’t about forcing your way through. It’s about knowing when to pivot.

If you’ve thought you’d be further along by now, consider that you’re not off course. Perhaps, you’re just being asked to shift. These three takeaways may help you see that pivot as part of the path, not a detour.

A Pivot Isn’t a Failure—It’s Feedback

You don’t have to keep doing something just because you once believed it was the right thing. A pivot isn’t a sign that you’ve failed. It’s a sign that you’re paying attention.

This has been true in my own life, especially recently. After Hurricane Helene devastated the North Carolina homestead I was building for retirement, I pivoted again when the Green River Gamelands—where I’ve lived and worked for 20 years—came under threat from wildfires. That land was my haven. I moved there to whitewater kayak and, more recently, to mountain bike—two outdoor adventures that helped me heal from C-PTSD.

And yet, instead of gripping harder, I released. My husband, our dog, and I are now setting off on a cross-country mountain biking journey in a van. It’s not the future I imagined—but the pivot excites me more than the retirement dreams did.

I wonder how you too will be surprised by your pivots?

Feelings May Be Valid But Let Facts Make the Call

When you choose to pivot, expect a surge of emotion. You might experience fear, guilt, sadness, or even shame. That’s normal. In fact, neuroscience shows that uncertainty and change activate the amygdala, the brain’s fear center, which can cloud your ability to assess situations clearly.

Emotions may give you important signals; don’t let them be your sole decision-makers. I’ve got two tools that may help you navigate more clearly. These tools are: cognitive reappraisal and interoceptive awareness.

Interoceptive awareness refers to your ability to perceive internal cues like pain, fatigue, or calm. You know when you instinctively “feel off” and may even say that to a friend or family member? This is what I’m talking about. Research links this type of awareness to better emotional regulation and decision-making, so pay attention to it. Don’t discount it. Many of us do, but that is a mistake.

Cognitive reappraisal helps you reinterpret a situation from an expanded perspective, providing the mental flexibility that supports pivoting. It reduces emotional distress. Also called “reframing,” it helps me recognize that although I might be stressed if my mother-in-law criticizes me, perhaps she simply wants to spend more time with her son, my husband. Then her comments bother me less; I can see that what's behind them is her love of her son. Reappraisal enables you to adapt more quickly to new circumstances. To reduce your emotional distress and develop an interpretation that empowers you, focus on the facts, first.

Here’s how you check the facts:

• What’s your body telling you about the situation? In other words, what can you see, smell, touch, hear, or taste? Ground yourself in reality.
• Are your routines sustainable? If you aren't taking care of yourself, you will constantly be in a state of survival.
• Is your energy consistently depleted or restored? Many times the emotions we place on a situation can distort and overwhelm. That can drain you.

Remember, progress doesn’t always come with a dramatic shift. Recognize that you need change. Then take a steady, informed step forward from facts.

Forget Linear. Growth Loops, Dips, and Doubles Back

Progress isn’t linear—it’s looping, spiraling, iterative (evolving). You come back to the same lessons with more wisdom. You take two steps forward, one sideways, and maybe a stumble or two back.

Consider, this isn’t regression but perhaps mastery in motion.

You can always seek help when you are facing change. I like to use therapy, coaching, journaling, or even a long walk outside to help myself reset my internal compass. Move forward by not worrying about having to shift. Think of it like dancing. You’re moving side-to-side. So, in fact, you’re always dancing: one intentional move at a time.

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I tell my clients all the time: What looks like a detour is often the path. Whether it’s switching careers, ending a relationship, or exploring the country on mountain bikes, you’re still moving. You’re just moving differently.

And that counts.