Married and Still Doing It

Relationships

How and Why to Talk About Our Sexual Past

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on January 3, 2022

A person's sexual life is profoundly revealing about their inner world, secrets, desires and capacities for love and pleasure. Why knowing this could deepen your own intimacy.

A person's sexual life is profoundly revealing about their inner world, secrets, desires and capacities for love and pleasure. Why knowing this could deepen your own intimacy.

Sex

What Does Your Partner's "Still Face" in Bed Mean?

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on November 17, 2021

A "still face" in the bedroom often communicates disconnection from a lover. Managing our own reactivity allows for curiosity to explore what it really means.

A "still face" in the bedroom often communicates disconnection from a lover. Managing our own reactivity allows for curiosity to explore what it really means.

Sex

Turning Toward Your Partner When They Want Sex and You Don't

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on October 4, 2021

For couples, emotional connection and sexual intimacy are dynamically related to each aspect of a marriage. Difficulties in sex destabilize connection.

For couples, emotional connection and sexual intimacy are dynamically related to each aspect of a marriage. Difficulties in sex destabilize connection.

Sex

5 Ways to Help a Frustrated Sexual Pursuer

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on August 30, 2021

Does one of you push for more frequency and the other withdraws feeling drowned by the requests? Rather than duty sex, here are ways the sexual withdrawer can change the dynamic:

Does one of you push for more frequency and the other withdraws feeling drowned by the requests? Rather than duty sex, here are ways the sexual withdrawer can change the dynamic:

Sex

Why and How to Talk About Sex While Grieving

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on August 13, 2021

Grieving is a complex topic. Sex is a complex topic. Talking about both may seem awkward, but for anyone in a relationship, the reality is, sex and grief will eventually converge.

Grieving is a complex topic. Sex is a complex topic. Talking about both may seem awkward, but for anyone in a relationship, the reality is, sex and grief will eventually converge.

Sex

6 Months for Couples to Cure Premature Ejaculation Together

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on January 10, 2021

Premature ejaculation is really about anxiety and the problem is the more you worry about it the worse it gets. Sex problems disconnects couple increasing the the pain.

Premature ejaculation is really about anxiety and the problem is the more you worry about it the worse it gets. Sex problems disconnects couple increasing the the pain.

Sex

8 Suggestions to Stop the Pursue-Withdraw Cycle in Sex

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on October 5, 2020

You want sex and your partner couldn't care less. Begging for connection only drives your partner further away. Why does this negative cycle get so stuck and what can we do about it?

You want sex and your partner couldn't care less. Begging for connection only drives your partner further away. Why does this negative cycle get so stuck and what can we do about it?

Sex

5 Tips to Holiday Partying to Keep Sex Hot at Home

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on December 9, 2019

With all the fun and festivities coming, ironically, the holiday party is often a minefield for couples.

With all the fun and festivities coming, ironically, the holiday party is often a minefield for couples.

Sex

How to Let Your Partner Know You're Not in the Mood

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on September 23, 2019

Every partner initiating sex hopes for an excited reaction from their lover. As long as we are honest, vulnerable, and direct, we can refuse and still stay connected.

Every partner initiating sex hopes for an excited reaction from their lover. As long as we are honest, vulnerable, and direct, we can refuse and still stay connected.

Sex

Sex When You Have Cancer

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on August 4, 2019

For people going through cancer, sex can be a powerful affirmation of aliveness – many patients say it is one of the most important markers for their quality of life.

For people going through cancer, sex can be a powerful affirmation of aliveness – many patients say it is one of the most important markers for their quality of life.

Sex

5 Mistakes Women Make in Bed

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on July 13, 2019

Women who think their sex life is lacking often assume it’s because they don’t have a perfect body or that they don't act like a porn star. False.

Women who think their sex life is lacking often assume it’s because they don’t have a perfect body or that they don't act like a porn star. False.

Sex

5 Mistakes Men Make in Bed

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on July 1, 2019

Most men come to sex therapy to learn better techniques. But while it is important to know what she likes specifically, his sexual skill isn’t usually what’s causing the problem.

Most men come to sex therapy to learn better techniques. But while it is important to know what she likes specifically, his sexual skill isn’t usually what’s causing the problem.

Sex

Toxic Cultural Messages to a Woman's Libido

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on June 27, 2019

You may not realize that negative messages received throughout a woman’s formative years can have a profound impact on how she sees herself sexually.

You may not realize that negative messages received throughout a woman’s formative years can have a profound impact on how she sees herself sexually.

Infertility

How to Stay Sexually Connected During Infertility Treatment

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on June 8, 2019

Forty-five percent of couples in treatment to help with infertility report having sexual difficulties. Sex "on the clock" creates pressure, boredom, and more.

Forty-five percent of couples in treatment to help with infertility report having sexual difficulties. Sex "on the clock" creates pressure, boredom, and more.

Sex

Sexual Pain: Six Possible Causes

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on June 4, 2019

If sex hurts, you won’t want to do it. It’s estimated that about 20 percent of women suffer vaginal pain with foreplay or intercourse.

If sex hurts, you won’t want to do it. It’s estimated that about 20 percent of women suffer vaginal pain with foreplay or intercourse.

Sex

5 Ideas to Spice Up Your Sex Life

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on March 15, 2019

Couples often ask me, as their sex therapist, how they can spice things up in bed. I think this question, most often, is really a request for permission to act on their own ideas.

Couples often ask me, as their sex therapist, how they can spice things up in bed. I think this question, most often, is really a request for permission to act on their own ideas.

Sex

How Sexting Can Be Healthy

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on March 10, 2019

Sexting has gotten a bad rap—and with good reason. Plenty of people have gotten themselves into hot water by sending inappropriate texts and pics... but here's a reframe.

Sexting has gotten a bad rap—and with good reason. Plenty of people have gotten themselves into hot water by sending inappropriate texts and pics... but here's a reframe.

Sex

Sex After Divorce: 4 Questions to Ask

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on February 10, 2019

Are you divorced and entering the dating scene a decade or two after you last went out for drinks? You are probably wondering about how the sexual game has changed.

Are you divorced and entering the dating scene a decade or two after you last went out for drinks? You are probably wondering about how the sexual game has changed.

Sex

Is Body Image Affecting Your Sex Life?

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on December 20, 2018

Body image can really mess with our heads—in bed. And for women, criticism of our bodies can have the biggest impact on sexual desire.

Body image can really mess with our heads—in bed. And for women, criticism of our bodies can have the biggest impact on sexual desire.

Alcoholism

8 Ways Alcohol Can Affect Your Sex Life

Laurie J Watson PhD, LMFT, LPC on November 22, 2018

The relationship between alcohol and sex is tricky. It can help us open up to healthy sexual activities, but there are risks too.

The relationship between alcohol and sex is tricky. It can help us open up to healthy sexual activities, but there are risks too.