3 Signs of an Entitled Adult Child

Parenting doesn’t stop when your child turns 18. In fact, for many parents, the emotional and financial demands only ramp up in adulthood. If your grown child expects constant help, rarely shows appreciation, or guilt-trips you when you say no, it may be time to face an uncomfortable truth: They might be acting entitled.

Entitlement in adult children can be subtle or noticeable, but it often leaves parents feeling drained, disrespected, or resentful. Based on the compelling stories from parents who contact me for coaching, I can assure you that you’re not alone if you’ve wondered, Is it me? Am I doing too much? Let’s break down three significant signs of adult-child entitlement—and what you can do to start shifting the dynamic. (The examples below consist of fictitious names based on my experiences as a parent coach.)

1. They Expect Help, Not Appreciate It

When 26-year-old Bryce asked his mom to cover his car insurance again, he didn’t say thank you. He said, “Well, it’s not like I asked to be born.” This response reflects entitlement: Help is seen as a right, not a gift. If your child rarely expresses gratitude and frequently makes you feel guilty for saying “no,” you may be stuck in the “Parent as ATM” trap.

Tip: Make appreciation a requirement for you. Say, “I’m willing to help, but need to feel respected. Gratitude matters to me.”

2. They Expect You to Fix Their Problems

Jada, 24, quit her job after a disagreement with her boss, assuming she could stay in her parents’ home indefinitely “while things blow over.” She didn’t seek work, didn’t help around the house, and snapped at her parents when they asked about her plans. Entitled adult children often expect their parents to rescue them from the consequences of their decisions.

Tip: Don’t rush in with solutions. Instead, ask them: “What’s your plan for moving forward?” Support accountability, not avoidance. You’re not abandoning them by encouraging independence—you’re helping them grow.

3. They Make You Feel Guilty for Setting Boundaries

When Milo, 30, was told he couldn’t borrow his parents’ car for the third weekend, he replied, “Wow, guess I know where I stand.” Entitled behavior often includes guilt-tripping, manipulation, or emotional pushback when boundaries are set. Parents usually feel torn between keeping the peace and standing their ground.

Tip: Hold the line without apology. Be firm and kind: “I care about you and have the right to say no.” Boundaries aren’t rejection—they’re a form of healthy relationship repair.

Final Thought

You are not being selfish by wanting more balance and respect in your relationship with your adult child. You are modeling self-worth, responsibility, and maturity. And while entitlement may have crept in slowly over the years, it's never too late to reclaim your peace—and encourage your child to grow into the adult they’re capable of becoming.

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